Wednesday 8 August 2012

Love Hate

I hate going through old pictures. Reminds me of the olden days. The days when I thought life was difficult, if only I knew what was coming later on. I miss the recklessness, the carelessness. I miss being a child. Even though I still see myself as a child, the list of responsibilities has changed very much since when I actually was a child. It basically comes down to the crude basics, You know, I used to live under someone else's roof; I used to be fed. But now I have to make the so called important life decisions. It isn't even a choice thing, it's a must. I simply have to do what needs to be done. Plus, of course, I feed myself. I am no longer a pet. What an analogy!

Don't get me wrong, it is wonderful to live my own life. However, I strongly believe that I still need guidance. In my mind I really am just a child despite the fact that I am 20 yeas old (not for long though). I am a child even though I earn and spend my own money. I am a simple kid, a lost one, and in some way I never finished growing up. So how do I get that back? How can I lead myself when I don't know how it's done?

Blah woman, You make me sick. Grow a pair, will you?!

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