Kur paliek tās dvēseles, kas apmaldās?

Šķiet, ka pagājusi mūžības laika tiesa kopš pēdējo reizi te kas rakstīts. Kā gan dzīvē tā gadās, ka neilgā laika posmā viss šķiet pavisam savādāk. Kas tā bija par meiteni, kas te gadiem ilgi bārstija savus domu graudus? Kur gan noklīdusi viņas dvēselīte?

Ir vērtības, kas no tiesas nemainās. Tēja, kā vienmēr, patīk vairāk remdena kā verdoša. Ceļošanai parasti nav nepieciešams nekas daudz vairāk par ērtiem apaviem un pasi. Kaķi ir forši. Mūžīgi mācos.
Bet ir dziļš dvēseles miers, tas Violai, Lolai, Lanai (..) nekad nebija. Viņa nesaprata kā ir, kad ir forši pat tad, kad liekas, ka visa pasaule brūk un jūk. Viņa uztraucās par to zemi zem kājām, kas grima, bet ne par debesu loku, kas pēkšņi pavērās, kad uzplauka spārni. Viņai tie spārni laikam vēl nebija. Tie nāk ar gadiem.
Vienmēr ir tāds nemiers prātā un garā, bet es zinu kur atrodas labie emociju viļņi.

Janvāris.

Laimes dalīšana.
Kur man likt visu šo laimīti? Kaklā iekārt? Iebērt burkā, vai pienaglot pie sienas, lai neaizbēg?
Vēlos jums visiem novēlēt šo laimi, jo kur gan es viens pats ar tik daudz laimi likšos? Man nav vietas, kabatas plīst jau pušu. Un es gribu, lai visiem tiek neliela laimes kripatiņa. Gribu, lai katram tiek lērums laimes, lai iemirdzas prieks, vēl gaišāks kā Ziemassvētku brīnums. Es gribu iekrāsot pasauli vēl neredzētos toņos. Gribu, lai cilvēki redz, ka patiesai laimei vajag ļoti, ļoti nedaudz. Un vajag, lai ir grūti, lai katru dienu ir par ko cīnīties, jo tas dod vēlmi novērtēt visu labo, kas tev ir. Es tā gribu, lai tu saproti manu domu - lai nepārproti mani. Nekad nebūs viegli, ja gribi patiesu laimi, tev tā ir jāizprot un jānovērtē. Citādi, tā kā smiltis izskries caur pirkstiem.
Viss, es eju būt laimīgs.

Real Eyes

This is what the Lisboa (Lisbon) streets teach nowadays.

Real Eyes Realize Real Lies
Lisbon

What am I doing?

HOW I FEEL - ALL AT THE SAME TIME:

 

AND THIS: 

This.

There is no Right Answer to All the Questions

Rīga 2013

 

"Nepūt pīlītes"

My new header picture on Twitter

 Cēsis, Nov 2013

 Tērbatas, Rīga, 2013 Autumn

Lisbon, Feb 2014

2014

It's here!
2014 has arrived. And change is about to happen. I would tell you what change, but I am pretty good at keeping secrets, so there is no way I'm telling you.

Either way kiddos, stay cool. :D

This Image

Someone posted this image in Facebook, and it pretty much sums up how I feel.

So she wrote

So she wrote a letter to tell him how she felt. She wrote a letter, and then she deleted it.
And so she never replied. She never forgot. No, he always stayed on her mind, every day she would find herself pondering about how things could be.. If there would be any change if she told him all those thoughts that were boiling in her mind. But she had come to a conclusion, she had decided that it's for the best. He soon forgot about her anyway, she became just another girl who he had met. Soon he forgot her name, and then he forgot her face, and she existed only in old memories that would never be bought back to life.

It was gone like the runaway train, it was gone to never return. She wrote a memory, a small note, an entry in a diary that did not exist. She wrote so she would not forget. She typed up the memories and saved them in a place where no one would stumble upon them. But they were there, just like old books covered with dust, the memories would hold still..

And then one day he wrote to her again.
He wrote:

Do You believe in magic?

And, in fact, she did, she believed that there was something more to life, she believed that things could happen just because.

So she wrote, she told him exactly that, that she believed in magic.

To which he replied that he would like to see her again, he was willing to buy a plane ticket to come see her. He would come when ever, but the sooner the better. He wanted to see her smile again, he wanted to see for himself that magic truly did exist.

She wrote back. She no longer lived in illusions, she said that she would be pleased to see him. She said that meeting him again would bring the most truthful smile in her face. She wrote to him. All the thoughts of him were coming back, they were simmering along the top of her mind. She never knew this would happen, she never thought to see him again.

But there he was standing waiting for her at the airport. He smiled a big smile and gave her a sincere hug, and didn't want to let her go. The embrace lasted for a at least two full minutes.

But then it didn't matter what happened next.
She had a second chance, and she wrote to him. She didn't tell him everything, but she said what was important - she said that she wanted to see him again... and again, and again...

Random - Santa Claus

So I saw an image on facebook. (this one)

And randomly I thought, how does taking off the mans beard prove that Santa is not real? I mean, one can always shave his beard and change his clothes. Theoretically, a child knows that, and if we were to ever tell a story about Santa changing his clothes, or shaving his beard, then he would believe it until you were to tell him otherwise, and even then, he might think you're lying.

What I'm saying is, that just because we have a different clothes on, or different hair style does not mean that we become a different person. You feel me?

Happy

http://i.behappy.me/67/preview.png

This picture has a significance to me. This image is now my background image on my phone.

What the heck, I might just break the news to you: I AM HAPPY.
Yeah, I can say it out loud, I scream it out! I really am happy. All those things I've known, learned, studied, read about...all that material I've laid my eyes on about how to be happy has finally sunk in. It is here, right here in my mind, and now I am using all the tools I have. Not all the tools, because not everything I know is relevant. But now instead of thinking how to be happy, or why to be happy. I just simply tell myself that that is how I feel. What is even more odd is that in my head I don't say You have to do this and this, or this is what you should have said. Instead, I simply think to myself I am happy, I will do this and that. This change has been happening over the past month or so, not more than that. I've reprogrammed my mind in the last three weeks. I am the same me, but yet I am much, much different. I am happy!

And I can't stop smiling now that I'm writing this post.
This feels odd.
This feels great!!

Migrating Fox

It's been dull, rainy all day; just the way I love it. But I spent most of the day inside anyway. I was at work. It always sucks to go back to work after a holiday.. Even when the holidays aren't long (like mine, usually short and sweet!!). The days are getting shorter, it's already getting dark outside now, and it's just almost seven in the evening. It's poker night tonight. I don't really know why I keep attending poker nights. It seems so vague, so shallow and empty. But somehow they fill up an entire evening almost every week. Some part of all that experience even fuels me.. in a way that can not be explained. My holiday was so short, but it seems like I was gone for at least two weeks. I am so recharged, a part of me has reborn, and I feel like an entirely new being. I can feel my pulse, and I can feel myself living, rather than existing. But my job brings me down. To be straight forward, my job is depressing to it's last molecule. Every bit of it is plain sad. I try to be positive, but I realize how pathetic it feels. I live for little things, the things that step by step are losing meaning, step by step my priorities change. And I often find myself at a state where I do not care about anything at all. There are moments where nothing has meaning, I feel as if life is an empty shall that simply lies on the shore, waiting to be washed away. What is life really? Is it a game? Or is it a book, that has already been written? I don't know how I view the concept of life.

Life is fiction..

Is it?

Wicklow Mountains

Rīga

September

How is life a book?

You start reading it even though you know it will end eventually.

So why live it?

Because You want to know the Story.

September has arrived. Almost. A few days ago I went through my old pictures from Ecuador (April 2009). All I can say is that I really want another experience like that one. I'll go for it, that's my final decision.

Now Playing: Alphaville - Forever Young

Draudzība.

Tu esi mana šķīstošā kafija.
Tā sķīst viss, kas netiek labi pieskatīts.

Bilde no flickr.com

best thing in Scotland so far

confused

I know that it's wordless weekend, but I just need to give a hint of how I feel. At the moment I'm very confused and I don't know what's going on in my head. Things are getting more and more complicated.

I keep pushing him away, but at the same time I wish there was a missed call or a text message from him.

image source: zparks.lv/images/text/W880_01.jpg

it's le weekend

beer time

I SAW A DRAGONFLY TODAY!!

Well hello there my wonderful world. The past few days have been great. Really. I know You don't hear this from me offten, but it is the truth. I will not go into details, since I am a very closed off person and all (gotta keep it up). HAHA

Spent a few days with Arita in Talsi. Well two of the days we were at the beach and it was raining all the time. Boo, and it is very, very hot now.. UGH.

Anyway, today I am in the city Saldus, in Kurzeme. Blah, blah, blah.. and we (my two brothers and I) were walking back to the house and my twin (Tašpuks) saw a dragonfly on a bridge we were crossing. I figured it got hit by a car since it looked week, but still alive. It was so pretty, and You can't imagine how glad I was to see it. (Me and dragonflies are like sisters.) So we took the poor thing and put it in the grass to recover. I hope it got it's strength together and managed to survive. I believe it did.

And just to tell you how much I love dragonflies I will put up a picture that i took with the camera that has no display.

Picture of the Day