Money Matters

It's almost 2013. Who would've knew that the year will go by so fast? The year really did go by fast, but when you come to think about it, many, many things have happened since the beginning of the year.
I was going to do a later sum-up-the-year post, but I have a feeling that this one will turn out into one.

In the long run it has turned out to be a travel year. January was the start of this journey, I went to Paris. In a way it had always been a dream city for me. Not entirely, but it was definitely one on my checklist. How could it not be, right? Then I also visited Scotland's capital, Edinburgh. Compared to Glasgow, it is much, much cleaner and more beautiful. February was a long month as well. I got my dad a lovely camera for birthday, then I went home to visit for a week. Also, in February before going to Latvia, I moved in with different people. Lovely people, and I come to thinking that the time I spent living with them has been by far the best time in Scotland. Living with Inga was great! I mean, I had a good friend for all that time.
Then March finally came and I went BUNGEE jumping. Now that was amazing. It was something I had always wanted to try, and was so very glad I finally did it. It was better than I had though it would be.
April went by quietly, did not do much, I suppose some small things added up.
In May I went to Northern Ireland. Before that my mom visited me on her way to Canada.
In June I bought my unicycle, and that is why it is called June. :D In July I got a new bicycle since my previous one got destroyed at the beginning of June.
In August I went about to see some other cities in Scotland, I visited Stirling and I visited Aberdeen. In September right after my birthday I went to Ireland, Dublin. After that I had a party for my birthday, it was fun. In October I went to London, and met my brother there, and we had a couple great days in the big city. November was the next best thing after Paris, I visited Iceland. An country with fascinating scenery. Then I went home again for a week to visit my family.
And it is December now already. Shall see what will happen before it ends.

There it is, my year in a few sentences.
Now I really gotta run. :D

Cuz I'm Going Crazy

This is just another story about an ordinary girl who lost her mind. This is no story. This is a simple statement, no story. This girl did not simply become crazy. She was crazy ever since she could remember herself. She was different, unique, useless. She was scared. She knew that one must let go of certainties, one must step out of the comfort zone, but she never took action. She knew how to do things, and once she knew something, she knew it well. She was good at the things she did. And she knew that she could do a lot more. She could do less, but she could also do more. She could tackle higher walls, she could build even higher ones. She'd be capable to do anything that she really wanted to do.

But she plays it safe, she is stuck in a routine. But she gets out of her shell every now and then. She leaves it all behind, if just for a day. Just to see something she has not seen before. Because the more she sees, the less she knows.

It's a simple statement. She is alone, and that is the way she wants things to be. There is no room for pity, there is no space for excuses, there is nothings that she hasn't heard. She has seen more than one can imagine. She has experienced things that can not be described, good and bad. She is lost, but she knows that she's lost. She wants things to change. Things change all the time, just not the ones she'd like to change. Turns out she can't control everything. She feels disappointed, and sad.

However, sometimes she knows how to let go. There are times when she is happy, sometimes for little reason, or no reason at all. Sometimes the reasons are good, meaningful. Now she is happy that she will be once again gone from life's hassles for some days. She will be all by herself, just the way she loves it. She will be still in her comfort shell, but in another location. She will be gone psychically and mentally.

So thanks for dropping by,
call again when I'm back.

Inside Joke

I wonder why you have that mixer in your bedroom. Not that I've been in your room anyway. I bet a man can be pregnant. And even more so, I'm sure you're a negro. Hide ya kids, hide ya wife. Well, I'm glad things are the way they are. Ok, bull shit. Fuck everything.

At least I'll be gone from all the crap in my life for some days as of this Sunday. Can't wait.

DUBLIN

Yeah, my birthday times continue. I slept zero hours on the tuesday night. I could have, but I decided not to. I was busy listening to lame songs, and trying to find out what is there to see in Dublin. I also got a day tour on which I went on yesterday. That was great. Today I still have a few things to do, so I should really get going. My flight is tomorrow quite early, but today I shall go out!! :)
Hope it goes well!!!

Birthday Post #3 - Pāris Vārdos

Neizdevusies, bet garšīga kūka. Netīras zeķes. Dažādi vīni. Mīļa kompānija. Dāsni palīgi. Ziedi & rozes. Kaķis kastē uz kartiņas. Melna pele. Smieklīgi video. Vecas dziesmas. Jaunas dziesmas. Kāršu spēles. Smiekli līdz asarām. Patiesība. Galīgākais sviests. Vīns. Dzirkstošais vīns. Gardas trifeles. Zemenes. Avenes. Salāti. Mellenes. Siers. Vista marinādē. Grilēti dārzeņi. Neatbildēti zvani. Vēstules. Īsziņas. Internets. Pārsteigums. Laika soļi. 21LVL(līmenis). Savāda draudzība. Maz bilžu. Nepacietība. Nogurums un bauda.

Visā visumā patīkama diena. :))
Tagad varbūt nedaudz jāpaguļ, rīt jāceļās ap četriem, tas ir pēc biči vairāk kā četrām stundām. Līdz tam vēl jāizdomā ko darīšu Īrijā.

Eh, dažbīd dzīve tomēr ir forša. (:

Where Are You Going?

Don't blame me; I'm a lost fool. I wonder places looking for something. What am I looking for? An adventure, I suppose. Well, obviously. But the thing is that I feel that I am looking for something else, but I can't put my finger on it. Or is it that I am simply running away from something, I want to get away. I always have been running from the present. No matter where I am, I always want to be elsewhere. Why is that? Don't answer that, it's a rhetorical question. I know what I'm running from. I can hear my own echo following me. Each sentence tells a story. Each sentence represents an eternity of confusion and insane minds. I shall miss the whole point of life, but I do not care.. At least I will have seen more than the average fool. I'm listening to old Eminem songs; I find myself thinking way too much again. I gotta learn from experience, when I over-thin things, nothing good happens.

Go and do, you fool. Just do it.

Did You See My Sexy Socks?

My brain is empty. I was going to talk about some boring things that are new at work. But then I realized how empty that would be. I wrote the fist sentence (We got work shoes recently.) And it hit me, how boring my thoughts have become. Ugh. Depressing.

All that aside. This month (as my one-a-month-thing) I will be visiting some cities in Scotland. So every Saturday, at the lest, I will be out of Glasgow seeing something new and exciting. This week I will be going to Stirling. It is a nearby city, closer than Edinburgh. I hear they have a lovely castle there (like most places in Scotland :D), so I shall have a look at it. Plus there must be some other nice things to see.

Life has it's ups and downs. I was biking home Monday night (with my new bike) and thinking about my life and where I am at the moment. I felt sad and depressed. I felt like a loser. For the first time in a long time I felt like crying. It hadn't even occurred to me that I have been quite happy recently. I don't even know why, life sucks. But all in one I actually feel a lot lighter than ever before. Maybe I finally see hope, somehow, somewhere. Maybe I believe in myself. Maybe I believe that I have an actual plan. But do I? Is it all just an illusion, again? Hard to tell.

June

I called my unicycle June because it was my June's one-a-month thing. :D

All this is mine

Every time I come in my room, I get a weird feeling. I think to my self: "All this stuff is mine." That's my bicycle standing right across of me. I have my laptop, my camera. I've got an exercise ball that I almost never use. That I almost never use. Most of the stuff that I have is things that I simply own, I just have them. I have books that I haven't even read. I have clothes that I have not worn in months. There's just too much  of everything. Too much. What for? What is stuff for? It makes me sick. It makes me sick to every pore of my body. I get goosebumps when thinking of this. What makes it even worse is that I can't throw things away. A part of me says that I will need this again some day. And, to be fair, I'm probably right. But who knows when that day will come. I have things. It makes me sick. I don't need most of them. What makes me sick even more is that there's people who haven't got a thing. There's people who wish they had a bed and clean bed sheets to sleep at night. There's pretty little girls and women in the world that would die to have at least one piece of jewellery, so that they could wear it to feel special. But do they need it? No. It is not a live-or-die necessity. Do they feel special anyway? What makes them feel special? Family? God? Religion? Traditions? Children? Money? Job? What makes YOU feel special? When was the last time you felt special?

I wish I had more. Not stuff, but wisdom. I wish I had the strength to be who I could be.

Not sure where I was going with this. Basically, I want to be able to stop buying material things.





All that aside, I believe I have decided what I want to do for my one-a-moth thing for June. The idea is to buy a big canvas, or just a simple BIG piece of paper (big meaning something like 2-3 m squared). Then buy some paint, some cheap stuff. AND then paint this big piece of space by using feet and hands. You know, kind of like letting things out of my system in a creative sort of way. Then I could stick this thing to a wall, or to the ceiling in my room. Or toss it out. It is the process that will matter. In most things in life the process is more important than the actual final result. Just something I like to think about.


Lately I've been thinking too much, again. About so many things that it would be even impossible to write it all down, not even in point form. Yeah.. So many things racing through my head all the time. I'm morally tired.

What Did You Say?

I'm in Derry, Northern Ireland. It is great to get away every now and then. :D
Since there is not so much to see here, and I can't help not to be restless, I plan on going to Belfast for one day! Yay me. Haha.

Is it in You?

This might seem odd to you that I say this now, after having had this blog, for say, for quite a while now, but here it goes. I have decided that I will write. Writing will be my THING. You know when you're out and about people ask You, what do you do. And from now on my one definite answer will be that I write. I write. As of this emerges my thing for April. I have decided on one thing so far. I can not revile it to you, as I still remain a secretive person. However I can tell you that, if everything goes as planned, then my One-Thing-a-Month for April will be something related to writing.

Wish me luck and endurance, as I'm sure I'll need both. ;)

Happy Easter to everyone celebrating it.
Have a great evening, bye.

I'm Loving It

I think I should do something about my good old blog "Song of the Day". I hadn't posted anything for a very long time (since last years October) and so I shut the blog down. It still exists, but it's not available to the public. Today I've been going through the last few songs on that blog and I came across this beauty Sloan - Unkind. There is something in this song that I really enjoy. It could be the rhythm, or the melody, or the simple lyrics, i'm not sure, but I have been listening to it several times now, and i'm not bored of it (yet). About that blog, I was thinking that in stead of posting a new song every day, I could have a Song-of-the-Week kinda deal, sounds reasonable, and keeps the idea going. I shall think about it.

I have been having a nice week, I blame the unusually good weather. Sun in Scotland is a luxury!


Plus I have settled some important matters regarding something that has been bringing me down for a very, very long time. In a few months this thing will be out of my life for good! Can't wait.


One more thing, I can't figure out what I should do in April for my one-thing-a-month. In January I went to Paris, this was a great opportunity to get away from everything, even if it was just for three days. In February I went back home for a week. Had a chance to meet my family and friends. Plus I was there for dad's birthday, which is why I went home at that time in the first place. In March I finally went bungee jumping. This was amazing!!! Probably the best choice I have made in my life so far!! I believe that everyone should try this for what ever reason they want to, either to push new limits, fight the fear, or be brave, or what ever... JUST DO IT! Really, you will not regret this! So now April is around the corner, and I still don't know what I should do. I have vague ideas, but none of them are spot on ideas. **Pounders.**


All right my lovely muffins, time to follow the white rabbit. :D

Just Do It

I DID IT! (:

Me, Myself and I

I will make this year more than any other year "everything about me and I". I will have ONE THING PER MONTH that is going to add another ckeck-mark to my life's TO DO LIST. (I'll label this idea as "my month", so that later i can follow up on it.) I have something for January, it will happen next week, but i'm sorta keeping a secret for now. (Although it is super exciting!!) For February I plan to move, still struggling about where to... For March I have a vague idea as well. Really need to go through with it. But I don't plan on spilling the beans as to what this idea is. But for the following months I still don't have any plans, but they'll come, don't worry. Besides, planning out everything kinda takes away the thrill of it.

Other than that I have already changed. I've progressed, and more than anything I hope this is not gonna just be periodical. I hope to not fall back in a booring routine. I have to keep up with this.

Meanwhile, I'm listening to Jazz, watching French movies, working out or jogging, and reading books of an odd type of anthropology. I'm growing again. :))