So much for the positivism that you wear each day like an old pair of socks. So much for being a good friend, when you're the one who leaves everyone behind while on a possibly final journey. You're a disgrace to human kind. You don't know where to stop. You fly in your dreams like a dragonfly. You can then stop and think; you can stop the time. No, wait, here goes another truth, it's not the time that's running, it's us. We never stop growing old. Take a breath, we're all young. We like to think otherwise because we are meant to grow up, that's what the society pushes on you. One should never stop dreaming like a child, one should always find happiness in little things. One should cry his/her eyes out if another homo sapience has done harm (physical or emotional). We should never lose the simplicity of love. It's wonderful to think of your dear ones as angels walking on the planet of earth. One should think of swearing as a terrible sin, that leads you into suffering. Bad words are followed by bad actions, we all know that. We should all, at least visually stay pure as the holy water. We must not forget that there's monsters hiding under the bed and in the closet.
We must stay brave, dream big dreams, and never give up on ourselves!
Showing posts with label sapnis. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sapnis. Show all posts
Sunday, 13 November 2011
Friday, 14 October 2011
Dream 2
I have no idea why lately I've been having very vivid dreams. They feel like reality. Plus some minutes ago I watched the movie Inception where Leonardo di Caprio is playing lead. It's a movie about dreams, and dreams within dreams. I bet I'll get lost in my tonight's dream world. Not only are my dreams very vivid, they are also full of fiction, fantacy fiction. It's the type of stuff that I would very rarely read or watch. Last night's dream was about saving the world from the future. Basicaly the story was set a few years from now. The plot was that people from the future have come to destroy the earth because of how it looks like in the future. Aparently about a hundred or so years from now the world will look like a doomed land that has nothing humane left on it. We will be living amongst our own rubish. People will be fighting for clean air and water. It all seemed paradoxal since they could come to the past and try to kill us where as they could have gone to an even further past and get all the necessary resources they need. But I suppose it was strictly prohibited. Imagine bringing molecules from the past to the future. There would either be the same molecule twice, or there would be only one of that molecule (which would, in that case be only in the future)... It comes out to be very complex (in my mind), so I can't really explain it.
Anyway, I'll try to keep up with remembering my dreams. I find it fun. Plus it gives me ideas what to write about. These dreams feed my imagination (or vice verca).
Anyway, I'll try to keep up with remembering my dreams. I find it fun. Plus it gives me ideas what to write about. These dreams feed my imagination (or vice verca).
Thursday, 13 October 2011
Dream
I had a dream that they built a lighthouse in the middle of nowhere inSpain. It was well known that such thing would be done, but nobody knew why. It was up to me, a non-government inteligence agencies best fish to find out what was up with this thing. The light house had high security and no one could get in. The gate hadn't opened once since it was created. All the construction workers who were working on it had dissapeared out of country. As I was digging to find out anything about this mystery, I came across many wornings saying that I should stay away from investigation. However, I kept searching. I found out that this lighthouse was plotted by the US governemt. Though when I contacted certain individuals they had no idea what I was questioning about. Soon I found out that there were three other such misterious cases. One lighthouse had been built in mid Peru in a small town. Another one was located in North Russia. And the third one was in Pakistan in a city that had about the same population as the small town in Peru. I looked for patterns of the four locations. Only one was found, they all are located the same amount of kilometers from an ocean.
...
...
Wednesday, 27 January 2010
this is where if i was a kid i would go to my mommy and cry my eyes out
No one has ever been against the fact that exams are not an easy thing and not everyone has the privilege to always do good on them (even though this depends on so many (too many) external factors). (Fine, yeah, there are people who disagree, but you get my point.) Days and nights are messed up again and i know for sure that i am still tired and that i do need more sleep before my next exam, (but forget about that).
World issues was a pain in the big intestine and the retina of my right eye. No jokes. (Fine, the intestine part is not true.) I was scheduled to write the exam in room 211 (just like one half of our class). In the same classroom the other half class was a grade eleven Biology (ohh sweet irony). It was the same class where i wrote my English exam last week on Friday and our class was in almost the same rows, and i ended up sitting it the same place as Friday, sweet, don't You think? The teacher who was supervising was not good at what she was doing, but who am i to judge(?) (examples would be that she did not tell the kiddos that they can't have their pencil cases on the table). I was in my exam mood and had just begun the first part of the exam and then out of nowhere (actually not out of nowhere, but from the hall) came a grade eleven guy (no surprise! (no sexism intended)) and said out loud "oh, i guess i'm late" causing a small wave of laughter in the Bio rows (HA HA HA, VERY FUNNY, NO GO AND SIT DOWN!). Well that wasn't enough. An other girl this time, but she was blond (i did not notice the hair colour on purpose, it just stared at me, and no discrimination intended, i'm blond too!), came in the class late. She distracted the exam mood by her funny laugh (yeah, funny.... guess who thought that.. yup, the Bio kids, and one guy specifically, dude, get a room!) that she probably caught from her friend who was even more late for her own exam. So i was extracted. Twice. (DO YOU NEED A SEA OF APPLAUSE BEFORE YOU FIND YOUR SEAT?) After the girl finally sat down i was able to get back to paying attention to my matters.
The exam consisted of four parts. The first was 30 multiple choice questions that were pretty tricky and i needed more time for them then i had thought. The second part was short answer. We had a choice. They gave us a list of 19 terms and we had to pick 10. The short answer had to include what the thing is and how it is important, and mention an example. The third part was (You guessed it) long answer. Again we had a choice (oh, sir, you are fabulous). There where ten quotes accompanied by a question or two (or three). We had to answer four of the ten. Last, BUT not least essay question. Where there is a long question and we had to answer in an essay format (You know, the good old, introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion).
I was back in my writing mood and still on the first half of the multiple choice questions and i felt it coming. There i was in the first half an hour of the exam with a migraine. I wished, i begged it to go away, but it became worse and worse. I asked to go to the washroom (that happens as following, the supervisor teacher calls another teacher that will walk with you to the washroom and back, good they don't actually come in and hold my willy (TAKE A PAUSE FOR THE LAUGH ;D )). The teacher watched me wash my hands and rinse my face. Then we went back to the class (oh how i wish i could have ran away). For a second it really did feel better, i tried to keep my cool hand to my forehead where the pain killed the most. But then it got even worse. It felt like most of the time i had kept my teeth so tight together that they started to hurt. I kept saying myself that i have to finish the exam and then i can go, finish and go, finish and go, finish and go. Soon it had replaced every single thought in my head, even the unconscious thoughts that control the breathing and the common sense. So now i had to remind myself to inhale and exhale. Finish and go, inhale, finish and go, exhale, finish and go, inhale, finish and go exhale. The patterns was extracted by the curiosity of the time. I still had more then one and a half hours till the end. Finish and Go! I started the essay after sitting in my chair and going nothing but holding my head. Thoughts just wouldn't come to my mind even if i pleased them with the idea that this would not continue long. I begun writing it and had to pay attention to every letter, every line i drew. I couldn't. The last pages in my exam where a mess. If one was to find all pages separate, no one could tell that the first page was written by the same person as the last page. I wrote something. No paragraph in my essay contained more then five sentences. But it was done, in this exam i could not have left it blank, it is impossible to not come up with some answer. I did not care about the length (though it did peak in my mind), the structure, the content. All that mattered was that it was done. I put all the papers together handed it in and marked the time when i left, it was two minutes past eleven. I had finished the exam in two hours and seventeen minutes. Just like that another part of the semester had concluded. I went to my locker, got my jacket and boots and left to the bus stop.
It was not too cold outside, but the snow flakes where hitting my brows and melting faster then i could think of them. The wind was blowing in my face. I let it get me colder and colder. I was hoping that the cold could take away the headache, freeze it away. It did, for about one second after that i just felt more pain due to the extreme dose of the cold. The two buses got me home and without thinking i was in my bed. Took me about 40 minutes to fall asleep. Once i woke up the headache was not gone, but i did feel better.
..and the exam just felt like a dream.
Now i was thinking to apply to another university. But i shall see, let's not forget that i still have Biology exam at 8:45 and i have to be in school at least 30 minutes before. It is almost five in the morning now.
I know, i am not a smart person. Tell me something i don't know.
P.S. Hope that the sarcasm along the way did not distract You, but rather enriched the time You spent here.
World issues was a pain in the big intestine and the retina of my right eye. No jokes. (Fine, the intestine part is not true.) I was scheduled to write the exam in room 211 (just like one half of our class). In the same classroom the other half class was a grade eleven Biology (ohh sweet irony). It was the same class where i wrote my English exam last week on Friday and our class was in almost the same rows, and i ended up sitting it the same place as Friday, sweet, don't You think? The teacher who was supervising was not good at what she was doing, but who am i to judge(?) (examples would be that she did not tell the kiddos that they can't have their pencil cases on the table). I was in my exam mood and had just begun the first part of the exam and then out of nowhere (actually not out of nowhere, but from the hall) came a grade eleven guy (no surprise! (no sexism intended)) and said out loud "oh, i guess i'm late" causing a small wave of laughter in the Bio rows (HA HA HA, VERY FUNNY, NO GO AND SIT DOWN!). Well that wasn't enough. An other girl this time, but she was blond (i did not notice the hair colour on purpose, it just stared at me, and no discrimination intended, i'm blond too!), came in the class late. She distracted the exam mood by her funny laugh (yeah, funny.... guess who thought that.. yup, the Bio kids, and one guy specifically, dude, get a room!) that she probably caught from her friend who was even more late for her own exam. So i was extracted. Twice. (DO YOU NEED A SEA OF APPLAUSE BEFORE YOU FIND YOUR SEAT?) After the girl finally sat down i was able to get back to paying attention to my matters.
The exam consisted of four parts. The first was 30 multiple choice questions that were pretty tricky and i needed more time for them then i had thought. The second part was short answer. We had a choice. They gave us a list of 19 terms and we had to pick 10. The short answer had to include what the thing is and how it is important, and mention an example. The third part was (You guessed it) long answer. Again we had a choice (oh, sir, you are fabulous). There where ten quotes accompanied by a question or two (or three). We had to answer four of the ten. Last, BUT not least essay question. Where there is a long question and we had to answer in an essay format (You know, the good old, introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion).
I was back in my writing mood and still on the first half of the multiple choice questions and i felt it coming. There i was in the first half an hour of the exam with a migraine. I wished, i begged it to go away, but it became worse and worse. I asked to go to the washroom (that happens as following, the supervisor teacher calls another teacher that will walk with you to the washroom and back, good they don't actually come in and hold my willy (TAKE A PAUSE FOR THE LAUGH ;D )). The teacher watched me wash my hands and rinse my face. Then we went back to the class (oh how i wish i could have ran away). For a second it really did feel better, i tried to keep my cool hand to my forehead where the pain killed the most. But then it got even worse. It felt like most of the time i had kept my teeth so tight together that they started to hurt. I kept saying myself that i have to finish the exam and then i can go, finish and go, finish and go, finish and go. Soon it had replaced every single thought in my head, even the unconscious thoughts that control the breathing and the common sense. So now i had to remind myself to inhale and exhale. Finish and go, inhale, finish and go, exhale, finish and go, inhale, finish and go exhale. The patterns was extracted by the curiosity of the time. I still had more then one and a half hours till the end. Finish and Go! I started the essay after sitting in my chair and going nothing but holding my head. Thoughts just wouldn't come to my mind even if i pleased them with the idea that this would not continue long. I begun writing it and had to pay attention to every letter, every line i drew. I couldn't. The last pages in my exam where a mess. If one was to find all pages separate, no one could tell that the first page was written by the same person as the last page. I wrote something. No paragraph in my essay contained more then five sentences. But it was done, in this exam i could not have left it blank, it is impossible to not come up with some answer. I did not care about the length (though it did peak in my mind), the structure, the content. All that mattered was that it was done. I put all the papers together handed it in and marked the time when i left, it was two minutes past eleven. I had finished the exam in two hours and seventeen minutes. Just like that another part of the semester had concluded. I went to my locker, got my jacket and boots and left to the bus stop.
It was not too cold outside, but the snow flakes where hitting my brows and melting faster then i could think of them. The wind was blowing in my face. I let it get me colder and colder. I was hoping that the cold could take away the headache, freeze it away. It did, for about one second after that i just felt more pain due to the extreme dose of the cold. The two buses got me home and without thinking i was in my bed. Took me about 40 minutes to fall asleep. Once i woke up the headache was not gone, but i did feel better.
..and the exam just felt like a dream.
Now i was thinking to apply to another university. But i shall see, let's not forget that i still have Biology exam at 8:45 and i have to be in school at least 30 minutes before. It is almost five in the morning now.
I know, i am not a smart person. Tell me something i don't know.
P.S. Hope that the sarcasm along the way did not distract You, but rather enriched the time You spent here.
Tuesday, 13 October 2009
i want
that all that matters.
ps. i never tell the truth!
and where are you?
i want to learn hip hop dance!!! more then anything ever, ever before!
ill keep on hoping, for now thats all i can do.. but maybe ill find some classes in november.. or the second semester..?
i reall hope so!!
ps. i never tell the truth!
and where are you?
i want to learn hip hop dance!!! more then anything ever, ever before!
ill keep on hoping, for now thats all i can do.. but maybe ill find some classes in november.. or the second semester..?
i reall hope so!!
my hip hop love: Flo Rida - Low
Wednesday, 5 August 2009
Zombie
Esmu ievērojusi, ka pēdējā laikā diezgan bieži atceros savus sapņus. Tas varbūt tāpēc, ka ikdienā saskaros ar krietni mazāk uztraukumu, raizēm un stresu. Skola nav. Lai gan, protams, ir lietas, kas liek pulsam sākt skriet straujāk un lietas, kas nodarbina galvu vairāk kā citas un arī konstanti.
Šorīt pamodos ar savādu jušķu pakrūtē. Sapnī bija zombiji. Un nejau kaut kādi, bet gan cilvēki, kas man pazīstami ir dažnedažādākos veidos miruši, bet nu mostās, lai ar mani aprunātos. Un vēl, vairums no viņiem mira tāpēc, ka bija darījuši kādu sliktu lietu, precīzāk - noziegumu. Šeit jau viss plūda tik tālu cik mana fantāzija. grrr
Šodien brauksim atpakaļ uz Rīgu.
Viss, man pārgāja rakstāmais..
Atā, pagaidām.
dziesma: The Cranberries - Zombie
(kad pamodos noklausījos dziesmu trīs reizes pēc kārtas; spilvens bija virs galvas)
Šorīt pamodos ar savādu jušķu pakrūtē. Sapnī bija zombiji. Un nejau kaut kādi, bet gan cilvēki, kas man pazīstami ir dažnedažādākos veidos miruši, bet nu mostās, lai ar mani aprunātos. Un vēl, vairums no viņiem mira tāpēc, ka bija darījuši kādu sliktu lietu, precīzāk - noziegumu. Šeit jau viss plūda tik tālu cik mana fantāzija. grrr
Šodien brauksim atpakaļ uz Rīgu.
Viss, man pārgāja rakstāmais..
Atā, pagaidām.
dziesma: The Cranberries - Zombie
(kad pamodos noklausījos dziesmu trīs reizes pēc kārtas; spilvens bija virs galvas)
.
Thursday, 25 December 2008
..bija tā
Es biju ciemos pie tantes, te pat Latvijā, kurzemē, ja atklāti. Patiesībā šogad es nemanot pati sev esmu nozaguzi svētku sajūtu. Tas notika tā nemanot, negaidīti un necerēti. Patiesībā ir neliela dusma.. uz sevi. Vienvārdsakot nogulēju visu Ziemassvētku vakaru un pamodos ap diviem naktī... un gulēt devos septiņos no rīta. nedaudz sačakarēti.. ne? Patiesībā adventes laikā biju vairāk gatava svinēt svētkus nekā tagad - kad tie ir pienākuši. Tas droši vien tā, jo nācās braukt šurp. Tur es jau biju sākusi gatavot dāvanas... ģimenei un draugiem, bet tagad nav ne vienam. man kauns, bet ko darīt?
Kad būšu atpakaļ tur, tad arī dzīve turpināsies. Šis te tik tāds neizdevies sapnis. Tad jau svētki būs atpakaļ maisā un sejā būs kāds viltus prieka smaids, kas tā pat nekad nespīdēs no visas sirds, nekad. Pat ja tam lūgtos. Bet ir labi, ka ir veitas kur var justies labāk, tad var saprast, kas ir un kas nav labs.
Gaiss smird nelāgi pēc tikko nodedzinātām brīnumsvecītēm. Vai esi redzējis kā spīd divgadīga bērna acis, kad viņš pirmo reizi redz šo brīnumu? To aprkastīt vārdos ir neiespējami. Goda vārds!! Es gribu, lai tā veinmēr rada brīnumus.
Šodien cepu piparkūkas un nolēmu, ka nākamgad gatavošu pati savu mīklu! Jāpamēģina taču.
Saldu tev dienu, es nu došos krāmēt savas lupatas koferī un klāt grauzīšu nedaudz pieceptās piparkūkas. (šoreiz gan bildes nava! :p)
Priecīgus jums svētkus, ceru, ka nosvinējāt labi un turpināt svinēt. Un gan es vēl jūs pasveicināšu arī jaunajā gadā, bet to pēc tam, ja būsit paklausīgi...
Kad būšu atpakaļ tur, tad arī dzīve turpināsies. Šis te tik tāds neizdevies sapnis. Tad jau svētki būs atpakaļ maisā un sejā būs kāds viltus prieka smaids, kas tā pat nekad nespīdēs no visas sirds, nekad. Pat ja tam lūgtos. Bet ir labi, ka ir veitas kur var justies labāk, tad var saprast, kas ir un kas nav labs.
Gaiss smird nelāgi pēc tikko nodedzinātām brīnumsvecītēm. Vai esi redzējis kā spīd divgadīga bērna acis, kad viņš pirmo reizi redz šo brīnumu? To aprkastīt vārdos ir neiespējami. Goda vārds!! Es gribu, lai tā veinmēr rada brīnumus.
Šodien cepu piparkūkas un nolēmu, ka nākamgad gatavošu pati savu mīklu! Jāpamēģina taču.
Saldu tev dienu, es nu došos krāmēt savas lupatas koferī un klāt grauzīšu nedaudz pieceptās piparkūkas. (šoreiz gan bildes nava! :p)
Priecīgus jums svētkus, ceru, ka nosvinējāt labi un turpināt svinēt. Un gan es vēl jūs pasveicināšu arī jaunajā gadā, bet to pēc tam, ja būsit paklausīgi...
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