Don't Date a Girl Who Travels

A friend of mine posted a link on Facebook.com to this lovely post: Don't Date a Girl Who Travels. It says that the text has been translated into several other languages, and Latvian was not listed, so I decided to translate it.

Nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo.

Viņa ir tā, kurai ir izpūruši, saule izbalējuši mati. Viņas āda vairs nav tik gaiša kā kādreiz. Tā pat nav saules skūpstīta. Tā ir sadegusi. Tai ir vairākas iedeguma līnijas, šur un tur rētas un kodieni. Bet par katru ādas  nobrāzumu viņai ir kāds interesants stāsts stāstāms.

Nesatiecies ar meitenei, kas ceļo. Viņu ir grūti apmierināt. Parastais vakariņu randiņš, filma un lielveikals viņai liksies galīgi garām, tas izsūks no viņas dzīvību. Viņas dvēsele alkst pēc jauniem piedzīvojumiem un  pārdzīvojumiem. Viņu nespēsi iespaidot ar savu jauno auto un dārgo pulksteni. Viņa daudz labprātāk kāptu kādā kalnā vai lēktu ārā no lidmašīnas nekā klausītos tavās lielībās.

Nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo, jo viņa tev uzkratīsies ar lūgumu, lai nopērc aviobiļetes ikreiz, kad kāda aviokompānija piedāvā atlaides. Viņa neballēsies Republiq clubā. Viņa nemūžam nemaksās simt dollārus par Avicii koncertu, jo zin, ka viena nedēļas nogale klubos ir apmēram tas pats, kas nedēļa pavadīta kaut, kur kur ir daudz interesantāk.

Viņai, viticamāk, nav patstāvīga darba. Vai viņa daudz domā par aiziešanu no darba. Viņa nevēlās strādāt vaiga sviedros, lai sasniegtu kāda cita cilvēka sapņus. Viņai ir savi mērķi un viņa pēc tiem tiecās. Viņa ir brīvmāksliniece. Viņa pelna dizainējot, rakstot, fotogrāfējot, vai darot ko citu, kur vajadzīga radoša izpausme un bagāta iztēle. Pat nemēģini izniekot viņas laiku sūdzoties par savu garlaicīgo darbu.

Nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo. Viņa, iespējams, ir izniekojusi savu augstskolas diplomu un krasi nomainījusi savu karjeru. Viņa tagad varbūt ir niršanas instruktore vai vada jogas nodarbības. Viņa nav īsti pārliecināta, kad kontā parādīsies alga. Bet viņa nestrādās kā robots visas dienas garumā. Viņa iet ielās un izbauda to, ko dzīve piespēlē, un izaicinās tev darīt tā pat. 

Nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo, jo viņa ir izvēlējusies dzīvē nedrošāko ceļu. Viņai nav plāna, nav vienas adreses. Viņa seko ritmam, un dodas tur, kur sirds vada. Viņa dejo pie savu bungu ritmiem. Viņai nav ap roku apsiets pulkstenis. Viņas dienas vada saule un mēness. Kad viļņi sauc, dzīve stājas un viss pārējais ir bijis nebijis. Bet viņa ir iemācījusies, ka svarīgākais dzīvē nav sērfot.

Nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo, jo viņa saka, ko domā. Viņa nemēģinās atstāt labu iespaidu uz tevi vai draugiem. Viņa zin, kas ir cieņa, bet nebaidās iesaistīties debatēs par globālām un sociālām problēmām.

Viņai tevi nekad nevajadzēs. Viņa pati zin kā uzbliezt telti, kā saskrūvēt dēļus, visu bez tavas palīdzības. Viņa labi gatavo ēst un viņai nevajag, lai maksā par viņas maltītēm. Viņa ir satriecoši neatkarīga, un viņai nerūpēs vai ceļo ar viņu vai nē. Viņa aizmirsīs tev nodod ziņu, kad sasniegusi galamērķi.Viņa ir aizņemta dzīvojot tagadnē. Viņa sarunājas ar svešiniekiem. Viņa satiks daudz interesantu, līdzīgi domājošu pērsonību no visām pasaules malām. Tiem būs līdzīgas aizraušanās un līdzīgi sapņi. Viņai ar tevi būs garlaicīgi.

Tad nu nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo. Un, ja nu tu nevilšus iemīlies kādā, tad pat neiedomājies viņu paturēt. Laid viņu valā.

And here is the actual BLOG where the post comes from: 
http://www.lovethesearch.com/

Silent April

I feel bad for the things that i did. I did this to make things better, but You turned it to be a dead dream.

Shut up.

no wonder people believe in the story of God

Hi my fellow worriers.
Life is life and it is so hard to realize that millions of lives can be in the hands of one single person.

A few days ago i went through my biggest "box of memories". It is nothing special, just a shoebox filled with little things (like tiny notebooks, CDs, floppy disks, pins, buttons, name tags, beer caps, etc). Each of these has a shorter or longer story behind it. This post is going to be about a CD that I have from my photography class that I took at the School of the Photographic Arts: Ottawa, the class was called "Youth Perspective". The CD was given to each of the students by the teacher. In there are pictures that changed the world, or pictures that teach a good lesson, or pictures that teach tips and tricks about photography. There is a Power Point presentation that teaches that Plastic Bags are bad and damage the world. There also were a few songs, and also a few links that either teach photography, or have some amazing photographies, or are simply good, there is other stuff too, but I haven't got to that yet. I needed to share this with You!

What I did was I marked all the files in there and pressed "open". Of course the computer was a little upset that it needed to open 74 items all at once, and so was I, but we got through it. At start it launched the Power Point presentation. Pretty impressive, quotes, and, of course, images. Powerful. Then i begun going through the links that opened up. Ok, i'll just add a list of them here. (Not all, since some were NOT FOUND)

• New Internationalist
• New Internationalist - A photographer's code
• Guidelines for Better Photographic Composition
• Edward Burtynsky - Photographic Works
• Photo Composition Articles - Guidelines for Better Photographic Composition
• Itchy Animation - Digital paint - LIGHT
• Amazonas Images
• Adbusters
• Lauren Greenfield - Photography
• Rabble.ca

These are in no order, but You should be able to tell which one is a teaching site and which one is a COOL site to look at (they all are but anyway..).

The one in bold is where i found a video. This video is really heart wrenching and I feel like I need to share with it. Everyone in the world should see this video. (It is a flagged video, so You have to be 18+ to view it, just saying)



It is painful to watch and personally makes me extremely mad!

Referring to the title, it comes to the fact that our lives depend on so much that i start to have a better view on people who believe in a higher power. I don't want to fall there. So I say as long as I have some control over what I do, I will do what ever I can to make this world a better place.

Thank You!

i am a hobo?!

Hello. It is Sunday. I would say that it is my favourite day of the week, but that is not true, so i will avoid that. We were planing to go to Montreal today to visit some places. You know, since dad is here for just one more week. But that fell apart because apparently the places where we wanted to go to are closed due to effing Canadians who are striking, as if they have no hobbies, but that. So we will be going to the museum of civilization to their new exhibition. I plan to not like it, though i am afraid that i will, a little.

The line of the day that was born in my head this morning is "I dreamt I am a hobo and i woke up tired". It is true, i did dream that i am homeless. I just think that there is something to think about. Since some think that being a hobo is easy, they think that they get money from the people who are nice enough to give change to street people and that they get food at soup kitchens and garbage, and shelter in the homeless shelters that are here and there around the city. Others say that they don't work, so they can not possibly be tired. I disagree. In the dream i was crazy looking for a place to stay for the night that had became unusually cold. I do not recall the reason why i was living on the street or how i ended up with no shelter for that very night. I remember being hungry and i remember that i was unable to ask people for help, just because i know how most people look at hobos. I was ashamed to be where i was. I recall being hungry and unable to eat, and i recall needing to use a washroom and i had no access to one. So absurd.
I remember that some odd family had a shed and they were happy to help me out, for the night at least. There was a girl who was about my age and we played chess on a hand drawn chess table and half of the figurines were missing. It didn't matter, we just played, she told me to pretend that i am just taking over someone's game who had lost some of the worriers. And so i did that. It was fun to play since no one cared who will win or who will lose - we were happy that we had something.. And i'm not talking about the chess board, i'm talking about the company each of us had. I was lucky to be in a shelter for the night. The girl was happy to have a someone to play with and the parents of that girl were glad that their daughter could be happy, at least for the moment.

Things like these make me remember how lucky i am to have a place to live in and a family that is there for me, even if not always they are right here beside me. So many people have no clue of what it is like to don't have the primary needs of a human being. It is ridiculous of what they think they deserve.. Preposterous.

too much to carry

Hello. March break is OVER. School tomorrow. It was OK. Went to Sudbury with part of da family. Visited some museums, got to see how real mining goes. Had a relaxing time. Oh, and my dad is here in Canada now, he got here a week ago and is staying two more weeks. I plan to go clubbing on friday, but i am not sure if i will. Maybe i will just go to friend's house and chill. Also, i have re-started to go to the gym. I'm very, very happy about that! Luv ya all.

And, here are some random questions and answers. You don't have to read them. I just did it for myself. But You may if You really, really want to. 

From now on, you can't tell lies, are you ready?

bring it on

When you go to the beach do you swim or lay out more?

Swim

If you were pregnant, would you keep the baby?

probably

Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?

it's alright

Who was the last girl you talked to?

some girl at the museum in Sudbury

Is there someone you used to talk to every single day that you don't talk to anymore?

yes

When was the last time you had ice cream? What kind was it?

one or two months ago, chocolate + walnut & maple syrup

Last person you went swimming with?

can not recall that

Is there something you wish you could tell someone but can't?

not really

How late did you stay up last night?

around one at night

How many kids do you want?

now- none, haha, later on, time will tell, maybe 1, maybe 6, hihi

Is it easy for someone to make you smile?

depends, friends usually can do that better

What was the last drink you had?

kefir

Would you rather spend a day outside with friends or inside alone?

now, outside with friends. sometimes, inside alone.

Would you go back in time to change something?

nope

How are you feeling?

lame

True love or a billion dollars?

billion dollars, i would spend some of the cash to find the true love, and than we will have money to spend on our happily ever after

Has anything happened within the past month that has made you angry?

yes

Are you happy?

sure

What are you craving at the moment?

go to da gym, but i have to leave in an hour, so i can't really make it on time, but it's ok, i'll go tomorrow after school, meanwhile i will stick to Laima candy.

What is more important in a relationship, happiness or trust?

trust? happiness? trust? happiness? aren't they linked? trust, i suppose, cuz if there is trust than there can be happiness, with no trust there will be no happiness.

Are you in a good mood right now?

define 'good mood'..cuz i don't know

Have you ever licked the back of a CD to try to get it to work?

haha, not that i can remember

What do you do as soon as you walk in the house?

put the keys back in my bag

Name some things you would never tolerate in a relationship?

rudeness and disloyalty

Whats the best thing that happened to you today?

i woke up

What is the cutest text message you have ever gotten?

can't name any specific one, but it would probably be some x-mas msg with a criminally cute rhyme in it

Do you trust people?

very, very rarely

What's your favorite color to wear?

green

Have you cried today?

no

Is there someone you don't ever want to be out of your life?

clean water

Have you ever thought you were gonna die?

no, i don't think about my death at all

Do you love the last person who called you?

think it was some rogers person or something like that! sad, i know.

Could you date someone taller than you?

haha, yes i could and i would.

Do you sleep on your back?

i sleep on my bed.

What are you listening to?

alternative, indie, jazz and other chit too.

Next time you will kiss someone?

sure

Where do you want to go?

clubbing

Do you think you can love someone without trusting them?

no, i don't think so

Have you ever been heartbroken?

lol, i have no heart to brake, so i guess so.

How did you feel when you woke up today?

happy it was sunday

Do you cry easily?

depends on the subject matter, sometimes i'm too sensitive, other times i'm a heartless monster

Ever cried while you were on the phone with someone?

yes

When was the last time you watched a horror movie?

~two weeks ago

Do you have any drugs in your room?

nope, never had any

Could you forgive your best friend for sleeping with your bf/gf?

if she slept with my bf how can she be classified as my BF?

Think of the person who has hurt you the most in the past year, who is it?

can't tell ya, i'm not a teller, i'm a keeper.

Do you love it when you say something the same time as someone?

love? no way. but it can be sorta cool.

What were you doing at 7:00 am?

sleeping

Ever receive a really long apology?

too long

Is there someone who you can spend every minute with and be happy?

yes

When is your birthday?

september

Are you a forgiving person?

yeah

Are you wearing makeup?

not right now

Anywhere you'd rather be right now?

far, far away. the woods of argentina, india, the moon, anything, as long as it is far away.

Does your phone ring in the middle of the night often?

there have been some crazy weeks, but not most of the time

Does the last person you held hands with mean anything to you?

no

Is anything bugging you right now?

a lot of things are bugging me all da time

What woke you up this morning?

the human instinct

Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?

if i really had to..

Do you have alcohol in your house?

yes

Do you miss being little and careless?

yeah, especially the carelessness.

Are you very sensitive?

i suppose

How many times did you go see the Twilight movie?

once, oh no, twice, i watched it the second time right before watching new moon

Where did you meet the last person you were in a car with?

don't know how you would categorize meeting your family.

Do you listen to music everyday?

not every day

Do you have any energy drink or soda cans laying around?

no

What color are your nails usually painted?

redish, pinkish, or the no colour one

What is your favorite number?

why would i have one?

Do you know your family members' birthdays?

yeah, but knowing is never enough

Do you have any tests or exams soon?

probably a test sometime soon

Coffee: Love it or hate it?

neither, i simply don't do coffee, it gives no effect

Are you going to go to bed, take a shower, or look for another survey when this over?

i will have to leave shortly, so none of the above.

What color hair elastic did you last use?

a round one. :D

How was your sleep?

alright

Last thing you did to someones hair?

just played with it, lol

Did anyone say they loved you today?

no

Are you more comfortable waiting or making something happen?

depends on how i feel

Have you ever kissed in the snow?

yeah

Are you good at standing up for yourself?

think so

Do you like being there for people?

love it

Do you often feel like you're becoming someone you don't want to be?

yeahh

Do you think you’ve made a difference in anyone’s life?

i think so

Are you starting to realize anything?

yes, too much

Ever lay under the stars with someone that you love?

sorta

Have you left some things unsaid with a certain person?

yeah

When did you last weigh yourself?

in the morning

Do you still talk to the person you fell hardest for?

yes

Is there someone you really can't stop thinking about?

used to be

What’s the worst feeling in the world?

that you've got nowhere to go for support in a critical moment

Do you feel like there's something missing in your life?

sorta

What's the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word, drama?

my drama class.

Do you think relationships are hard?

not sure

Does it bother you when someone lies to you?

i simply hate it

Are you open about your feelings or closed off?

closed off

Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?

naa

What are you doing right now?

getting ready to leave, and this

Who were you last talking to on Facebook chat?

offline always

What's your favorite colour?

green

What Are you doing tomorrow?

school-home-gym-home-sleep

Are you in love?

no

Have you ever taken a picture of your eye?

once or twice

Do you actually have a favorite flower?

no

Can you change a printer cartridge?

yes

Do you have sensitive skin?

yes

Do you recognize Justin Timberlake’s songs?

yeah

When did you last have a cookie?

today, i think

Are you lactose intolerant?

no

Are you a sarcastic person?

haha, not at all.

lol, yes i am.

Who were you in middle school?

i was her

Memory to Memoir

The past weeks in writers craft we have been writing memoirs. The first one was just like a intro, so we get the just of it and how it is done. It had to about three childhood smells. As it is writers craft, memoirs too are all about using imageries and other literary devices that make the text more delightful. The second memoir is a bigger and longer piece and can be written about any memory, or series of memories. Right now i am in the rough copy one stage. Can't wait for it to be done, but more excited i am for the process it self.

Smile.

Wish me a relaxing March Brake!!! ;D

The other girl

There is this girl that lives with me in my room. We fight. We fight a lot. We fight all the time. We fight too much. It is because we are very different people. When ever i like something she thinks it is the worst thing in the entire world. And the things she adores make me puke. She is the south and i am the north. Total opposites. She never listens to me. She does things that annoy me. She treats people differently. She has a very different perspective on life. She gives me hard time when it comes to eating. She says i eat too much and that i am too fat already. I can't fit in my old jeans. She tells me that i pay too little attention to my school work and that my bad marks are just the proof of that. She tells me that i don't know how to get friends and that i don't understand people. One day she told me that the career that i plan to pursue is not the right for me. Who am i kidding? She has said that more than once. To be precise, almost every day.

She thinks about me all the time.

All in one she is a very nice person. But i can't stand her any longer. I think i will need to ask her to move out. I am not sure though if she needs a week or two, or maybe i should give her some years, You know, around fifty or so.. I will think.

Her name is Marta too. I think it is odd that so different people can have the same names. What the heck, at least there is something we do have in common.
Oh, one more thing - I am her.

Thank You! I'm off now.

Bang Bang..

Maniac, i say maniac. You are the maniac of my life. You sit inside me and don't let me go. You control me as a captain controlling its own Titanic. We all are doomed to fail sooner or later. Why delay these thing? But there you are keeping me away from extinction and following the so called common sense.
All i need is to get away. Away from days, go and live only at night. Live with a lower life and breed of of drugs and alcohol. But you say no, you keep my head cool when all i can think of is going underground. You keep me down on earth on nights and days when i just want to fly in the clouds. You order me to do things i don't want to do. You scream like a raped child in my head, you never let me free.


Yesterday got home at around half past three. I was walking and the cold just hit my face. Slap by slap. It was numb, i didn't feel a thing. The skirt was still cheating on guys, one by one, but all i cared was that i had to walk. Just walk. Never did i mention the destination in my mind. Even the other me kept out of this. She had been yelling at me all night, so it was time for everyone to shut up. I got home, colder then ice and crawled into my bed the blanket was at my feet. I was so cold and yet i relied on myself to regain the warmth. I couldn't fall asleep. Thoughts kept waking me up. And in total i had slept four hours with more then ten times waking up during this so called sleep time. The other me tried to keep me in the bed, so i could get some more sleep. But my body needed to move. I finally changed and tried my best to get out of the bed with the right leg. A fail. My head is still dizzy and i am rethinking so many things in my head.

I'm am beginning to be even more careless.
Never did i know that that was possible.

Song: Bang Bang by Nancy Sinatra

Life Just Goes On

Lately i have been trying my best to find the most appealing Template for my blog. So far i have found nothing that would make my heart race faster then of those who are in love. But this one was pretty close, so i have decided to quit searching. For now. Maybe i will sometime else, but now i am just tired of the templates stuff. I like that this one kinda smiles at You when You open my blog. And at the same time it is a little sad, since the majority of the blog is black. I think it is too black, but the top part (the place where title is) is so pretty that it is worth to keep this one. At least for a while. Also, i have been going crazy "Dropping" on blogs. Do You see on the very right column at the top there is a featured blog? Well it is this add campaign thing, You put the widget on Your blog advertise your blog elsewhere and get more traffic and more followers. I am not REALLY sure why i'm willing to put much work in to just advertising this blog. I say it is because i like it too much and i want more and more people who might be reading the jazz that i right.

Today had a field trip to a universities lab. Chemistry, all Chemistry. We did a laboratory work something about iron concentration in a Pro Lab! Was pretty cool, since i don't plan to study chemestry once i graduate it was once a lifetime experience. Once the lab was done we had an hour for lunch and after that we went to an auditorium with university's first year chemistry student and listened to one lecture. This was the first out of five about acids and bases, don't mean to insult anyone, but it was all grade 11 review for all of us. So that part of the field trip was not exciting. Not at all.

Then i got home and never received a call from Mrs. B (I call him Visvaris, not important why). The conclusion is that i hope i shall never see either of them ever again. Yup! As i said after last saturday, i was happy the way it was, even with them not contacting me. Btw, i kinda hate how much males fale at communication. It kinda brings me down, but i don't let it, so i'm alright!
(And, just to let You know, i met A yesterday, a complete disaster, with a hint of the worst seasoning there is, and Bull Shit as a side dish.)

As well as wanted to let You know that my TTT (Tavas Tintes Traips) blog has been renamed, now it is "Growing Words", but knowing me, it might be changing. I really love the blog description line: "·¼ of my life·". And even though it is no more TTT, i will still be calling it TTT, since that is the Label that i used for it and i just like it! ;P

School tomorrow. Friday is PD (professional development), a day when only teachers have to go to school and learn new ways, strategies, tips in teaching, while we (students) have a day off! I am not complaining about that! School is just not for me, not any more!

I really want to be "Outta Here" [here being my school].

Kisses. Wet and ugly, and yet filled with all the love i can possibly give right now.

empty shell, silent bell

Just like that.
"I screamed in your ear" and the time stopped. I have changed around my TTT blog added pages and stuff. Think it looks better now. Would be awesome if You could check it out.

I was going to make a contest, where i would give away a pair of those red olympic game glowes, but i run out of money (so i couldn't buy them) and time (so had no time to set something like that up) so i am guessing that that will remain as an idea.

"I just wish it was different..."

THREE days, People

Exams start this Friday. I hate repeating myself, but really, I CAN'T WAIT!

Today I wanted to talk about the people who you sometimes say "HI" to when You pass them in the hall. Though most of the time you wish you hadn't seen the person. In some cases you actually ignore them and pretend to not have seen them. Ever been in my shoes? Well, I have.
It gets even worse when i get on a bus and one of these people happen to be on that bus. In that case there are several things that can be done. First, ignore them, if they come by and say hi, then say "oh, where you on this bus all this time?". Second, say a vague HI of just smile at the person, what ever You do do not sit beside him/her. Third, go and talk to the person, these conversations usually turn out a waste of own thinking time. They screw you, literally. So most of the time i choose the second option. It does not make You bitchy and you also don't have to make a canadian out of your self by asking things like "How are you?" or "I like your jacket, where did you get it?" Grrr.. I just hate those conversations.

Yeah... thats about it for now.. I think.
Except. Not that You care, but i had some fun times at omegle.com. (don't ask me why i even went there, cuz i don't know myself)

As well as, the thought of yesterday: "Krievs iespļauj mīļā bērna sejā."

~Your Personal Bug! ;D

Bad Coca-Cola

Have You seen the movie FLOW?
If You havent , then definitely do so!
Basically it is about how clean water is going to be the "new oil", as in, now people, countries, corporations are fighting for water. The winner can be very easily detected because in this system it works very much like in Darwin's Natural Selection. The one who has more power and resistance to todays rules of life will survive. In this case it is the BIG companies, like Coka-Cola, that are stealing from weaker and developing countries in other parts of the world (or as some say, from the third world countries). What these multi-million corporations do is they seek for places where to get clean water; since the pollution has destroyed oceans they have to dig where there is less pollution and where no one (well, they think so) is using the water. They go to small communities in countries in Africa, take the places where international volunteers or the communities themselves have created acceptable clean, drinking water. This results to increased diseases and child death (which also links to overpopulation). It forces people who have no power in their hands to wait for water after walking incredible distances for hours, days, even weeks (and yet they might leave with no fresh water), if they do get water they have to carry it back home. The most convenient way is to put full baskets on head (this is done by women and children). These conditions in many cases leave no other solution then to drink (!!) water from polluted rivers, where companies (with very low security standards) dispose their chemicals, where animals (sometimes sick) swim and drink, where people bathe.
Is that fair?
As individuals we an choose to drink tap water (if You know that it is clean). If You do buy bottled water, then buy LOCAL (My Dear Friends, ALWAYS Buy Local Stuff, ALWAYS) company bottles, before checking that the water they sell is not gained in a very unfair, illegal way. What ever You do, DO NOT BUY COCA-COLA, NESTLE, PEPSI PRODUCTS. If You do then You will be supporting them as they take away water from innocent people, as they destroy lives, as they steal what is not theirs. At least now, that You know, PLEASE!!!
That is what I have decided to do. I will not use these three company products. My morals have drawn a line, and that is where it is!!! I can't use their products knowing that because of that people in a developing country are suffering!! Water is not just for people who can buy it! Everyone has a right to clean water.
You can't make a change, but a group can, You have the choice now to be part of people who agree that CLEAN WATER IS A RIGHT!!

The Truth

Actually I wanted to talk about:

• School & Exams
• Ottawa Green Bin! (yeeeey)
• Friends
• Facebook
• Universities
• Life
• The bus ride to school today
• How much life sucks
• How hard life is
• Sleep
  
• Movies
• Shakespeare
  
• and other stuff ...

Ohh well, some other time, when the exams are over, until then You will probably read some crap like in the previous post or no crap at all..

living it - could be a radio report

This is how the world should be:

• people have certain number of needs
• the needs are: home (an apartment, so less surface is used), work (close to home), shopping place (preferably grocery store, or even better, a mall), park place (or something as such), education (school and collage (or university)), security (police, fire department, hospital or walk in clinic etc), energy (better if electricity, not gas), water (clean and filtered), and a disposal system (such as landfill, or better, a recycling system, where everything gets recycled. (Who cares about pollution?(!)))
• every single being can live with out one, would not be entirely happy, but would be sorta OK
• everything should be maintained in a certain balance
• one person (we would call him/her a dictator or a royalty (not in nowadays meaning))would be the head of all the systems in place, so if an individual is not entirely happy, he/she would go to this person in charge and say what ever his/her concern is
• the dictator person would then see if if this person is not the only one with such concerns, if is, then WHAT EVER, but if not, then do something to change the situation. this can be either radical change, such as killing spree (ex. blowing up an apartment building) or building a new place (ex. park, police station, subway), to ensure that such concerns are present anymore.

One could say that that already is how the world functions. I say it is not. There is such a thing as feelings and more deeper concerns that can not be fixed by some dictator. We all are human beings and no matter how badly one might deny this, we all need love. It can be any kind of love, love from one significant other, parent - child love, sibling and relative love, love of god, love from a team or a club, love of nature, love of wellbeing, love of money and power, love of memories, love of forgiveness, love of understanding, love of stuff, love of food, love of order and chaos, love of passion, physical love, love of peace, love of reliability, love of night life, love of a close neighbour... LOVE.

Blah, blah, blah. I know that there are people who say that love of a person, one single person is not the same as loving chocolate. And that is absolutely right. True love between two (or more for that matter) individuals can give a better, deeper satisfaction then love of chocolate. But both kinds of love give you some level of satisfaction.

And that, my friends, is what matters the most, if we have what we need AND an emotional satisfaction then we are happy!!

♪♪♪
start off with something VERY steamy and jazzy
Zooey Deschanel - Dream a Little Dream of Me
following by the Good Old nostalgic band
The Beatles - It's Getting Better All the Time
next up,a song that can be liked
Basement Jaxx Feat. Lisa Kekaula - Good Luck
ending with a hot chilly that is very well known
Red Hot Chilly Peppers - Scar Tissue
♪♪♪

Thank You for listening and we shall meet next time when we return with other life realities that brake stereotypes and all the other pain causing matters, so we can all live more fulfilling lives.

Elektriski..(?)

Es nezinu kā to visu sauc. Par marasmu vai neprātu vai gluži vienkārši par mākslīgu elekrtisku enerģiju, kas negribīgi dzen uz priekšu, bet tā, kā nekur netiek; vismaz uz priekšu ne. Paslēpties ir pavisam vienkārši, bet izlīst ārā, kad spēle jau galā gan nav tik viegli.
Pirmdien uzmeistaroju pirmo kūku savā dzīvē. Nē, nu kaut kādas jau es biju cepusi, bet šī ir kārtainā. Mammai bija dzimšanas diena.
Vēl nav izdevies to nogaršot.

Pavisam nelaicīgi nāk sasmērētais sviest, kas visu tikai vairāk un vairāk sanes dēli.

Esmu atsākusi runāt ar Plakni, pagaidām gan tikai Facebooka līmenī, bet tomēr, es domāju, ka tas skaitās. Pavisam drīz (cerams) arī skaips leks no biksēm ārā ar dīvainām sejiņām un absolūti tukšām sarunām.

Zābaks tik pat sarkans. Pirms neilga laika zem milzīgā uzraksta parādījās "I would cry if my tears weren't frozen". Nē, tas laikam nu jau ilgāk ne neilgi.

TTT (for those who don't remember TTT = Tavas Tintes Traips) pēdēja laikā nav bijis dāsni apdāvināts, bet kam gan ir laika? Nekam!

Neprātīgā ātrumā tuvojās Ziemassvētki. Es neesmu gatava. Man labāk patīk iesaiņot dāvanas nekā tās gādāt. Smieklīgi bija tas, ka vienai dāvanai (draudzenei bija dzimšanas diena) man bija uzmeistarots gaumīgs auduma maisiņš, kur dāvanu ielikt PIRMS man vispār bija pati dāvana. Dāvanas vispār ir jēla lieta, bet man tik un tā patīk, gans saņemt, gan dot. Tas rada prieku. Kā jau pie svētkiem arī šajā kaktā katru svētdienu paštaisītā adventes vainagā iedegās liesmiņas. Un pavisam nesen tika ceptas arī šīs sezonas pirmās piparkūkas. Pie durvīm ir piekārts skuju vainags. Atliek vien savārīt zirņus un visus pārējos gardumus, iegādāt egli, sapirkt + sasaiņot dāvanas, nopirkt mandarīnus (manu prāt izcila Ziemassvētku sastāvdaļa), brīnumsvecītes utt un Svētki jau būs pie durvīm pieklauvējuši.
Dzirdēju, ka LV šogad zemu grādi nokrituši. Tas labi, man prieks. Citādi jau kāre aizsūtīt sniegu. Šeit tas ir daudz, ļoti daudz.
Autobusu izmantošana ir atkal dzimusi un ritenis drūmi tup garāžā. Nu neko. Auksts.

Now MTP (Major Term Paper)

words to live by

"No man is worth your tears, and the one who is won't make you cry."

"I Listen to the Wind, to the Wind of My Soul"

“I’m not a good dancer. But hey...what I’ve learned is that no one’s really watching.”

"There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened."

“Law students, especially, are very interesting. Because they think that they know everything. It’s like: 'You kids have no idea.'”

“If you really want to do something, I fully believe—and this has been explained to me over and over and over again—that you make time to do it. Things that I really want to do, I make happen.”

“This can be heaven on earth or it can be, you know, hell, no matter how you look at it.”

"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak."

"The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."

"Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted."

"Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you have."

"Sometimes you have to stumble in the dark to find the light."

"A real friend will tell you when you have spinach stuck in your teeth."

"I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore I am perfect."

"If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it."

" There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works."

"Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it."

"[My] mind not only wanders, it sometime leaves completely."

"Seen it all, done it all...........can't remember most of it."

"Dogs have owners. Cats have staff."

"A real friend is someone who you can sit in complete silence with and still walk away feeling like you just had the best conversation of your life."

"If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough."

'I never thought that i could lose one more soul...Nor did i know that i had two.'

Here You go, pick one.

Today was the last show night! It was great! All the plays were so fabulous..
I sort of want more, but at the same time.. isn't that what makes it special, that it came, and now is over..? Yeah, i think so. It was a unique week and most of the people involved will probably not forget that they participated in this.
Tomorrow we are having a Backstage Party at Zoe's house. Almost all the backstage people are going to be there. Can't wait.

I'm still sick. Its not getting any better and makes me wish i was in coma or something. Plus there is Saturday school. I gotta catch up on some homework. Slacked off all week. Yeah. I do that all the time.

Should i go to the party?

The second choice. It was a friends birthday this Wednesday. He turned 19. Good for him! :D Well first he is going to this awesome hotel party that my friend is having, and then they are going clubbing. I was invited too.

Now I don't know what to do. Two parties one better than the other and vice versa. Or I should just stay home since I am still a little sick?

I don't know.

Songs:
Apocalyptica - Fade to Black
All For You - Janet Jackson
Chris Brown - Run It
Michael Jackson - Man in the Mirror

written in May 2009.

You are an immortal. And somehow you seem to hate everything about yourself, but your mind always lands on this one little hope, - that no matter what, you have your friend there for you. And you just know thet he is going to love you no matter what.

So, if someone who you bearly know tells u that you are an ugly loser who has no life, you seem to not care. Why? Becuase this person doesn't even know you, there for he can't know anything about your life.

But then your only friend, - the one who you trust more then anything in your life, the one who you love no matter what he has done because he has always been with you in those special moments; and he has held your hand when things have been too tough to handle. - Tells you in your face everything that you hate about yourself, in every detail, with endless floods of hate. He tells you how misrable your life is and what a low-life creature you are.

Your brain sudenly loses sence of reality.
You feel like you are in the worst nightmare that has ever been.
And you close down,
you shut up.You have nothing to say back.
Your eyes fill up with tears. There is so much of them that you could drown.

There is this sudden pain (that has not left since) and you cut your self open and you shoot out everything that you can, just to make him feel like you; though there is no pain that could be compared to this.
There, you and your only friend in the middle of the worst fight that no frindship can survive.
The pain is terrible.
It is as if you are the most sensible being in the whole universe and someone is ripping your heart out. But it woun't, the heart just stays inside your chest in an open wound and keeps on beating.
The pain is so bad that you wish you never had a heart, you wish you never had anything.
You wish you were a mortal. The pain is worse then any phisical pain, then any other emotional pain. It is like surviving an earthquake all by yourself. It is like you are the bridge that was built for a purpose, but can't function. You collapse.

But you hope, you think that a "sorry" might fix it all. It is your last hope to end the pain.
But even after the "sorry"s have been said, the pain is still present, it has decided to stay there forever.
It is never visible to others, but it burns inside of you like an olimpic tourch right by your heart, never stops burnung.
Now, whenever someone tells you those things the pain grows, and even if the fiend is someone who does not know you, it still hurts. No, burns.
Why? Because you know that it is true. Deep beneath the surface you scream to your self, that he is right.
And now, you have no friends, because the pain that abids in you does not let you to get close to anyone - ever - because deep inside you don't want the pain to grow - it is just too hard, it's just too hard, unbarable.
But you do talk to people.
You even talk to the one who caused all this pain. Why? Because you are too wounded to relize that the world keeps on turning. You are ready to bear anything..
But every time you see him you remember that time, and that feeling will never let the pain go.
And you feel like a pathetic dog.
You keep hoping, wishing that some day everything will sudenly go good again.
So you stay loyal to you 'good' old friend and every time you do a favour for him, you feel even more pathetic and useless..
This will never end, because there is this hope that is inside.
...and the pain, it subsists in you,
it has no weekends, holydays, celebrating days.
It has you. .. the pain just lives inside and keeps growing bigger and bigger...

..You just wish you could collapse and end it all, but you can't, because you are an immortal.



... ... ... thats what it feels like.

Tā tas ir bijis pirms tam un tā tas būs mūžīgi! :[

i want

that all that matters.
ps. i never tell the truth!



and where are you?

i want to learn hip hop dance!!! more then anything ever, ever before!
ill keep on hoping, for now thats all i can do.. but maybe ill find some classes in november.. or the second semester..?
i reall hope so!!

my hip hop love: Flo Rida - Low

life IS a bitch

someone should slap me, atleast ten times!!!!
Please!

I think i should just leave it as it is..
but there is just too much to do. ..
AND
next weekend Canadians have thanksgiving, so its a long weekend + friday is a P.D. day (=no school). So we will have 4 days off. Friday going to Carleton University day, signed up today for some social science workshops. Saturday it is going to Clare's birthday party!!! can't wait. Sunday... hmm.. we shall see about that. And i should find some place to go on thursday after school!! And Today was first day of backstage, tomorrow , second day. But at lunch - first improv meeting of this school year! (hope i can get the lunch time free, so i can go.. i REALLY want to!!!) Wednesday it should be all about singing, but it is not going to be, because we will be deciding on backstage cast. .. I could go ON and ON about how much needs to be done..

Songs:
The Beatles - Blackbird
&
Sting - Fields of Gold


Izmest
Uz baltas papīra lapas
Uztriept paša jūtas.
Bez līnijām vai rūtīm,
Samaksāts par izrādi,
Vēro publika aizvilktos aizkarus.
Slīpāk un slīpāk svītras veido
neizteiksmīgus burtus.