Gym

Life keeps changing around me. There are some things that remain constant, however, there are also things that don't stop changing. I keep changing in ways I never thought possible, outlook on life keeps changing as well.

You know how there is people who talk a lot about doing something. Well I'm one of them. But in some ways I've finally begun actually doing stuff. I should't get too excited though, since there still are many plans that I have not completed yet, for instance, letter for future me, or finishing reading this book I started several months ago. What I am saying is that there is still a lot of place for improvement, and I know I am getting there.

So here is my gym story. I finally joined a gym, that happened on the 28th of February (the day my third nephew was born (: ). And I've been attending the gym not less than four times a week for seven weeks now (for those who are looking at the logistics, the first week was before I even joined, went there on a guest pass). I love it there! Keeps me out of the flat, keeps me feeling good. Soon after joining I started to go to Zumba classes on Tuesday mornings. And now I'll start to go more often in the mornings. Doing some cardio in the morning is a great way to start the day. I go to many other classes too, my favourite is Body Attack. Plus I've also begun to eat breakfast on a daily basis. I've built some muscles that I never knew I had. I feel stronger. 

I've met a guy there at the gym, and he asked me out. But I can't seem to care to reply to the last text message. He asked me out despite the fact that I told him about my plans of moving soon. He is nice, smart even (a rare bread!), but I don't like where it's going. So I don't know if I'll get back to him. I'll see him at the gym when his tattoo heals, and it will be awkward at first, but I'll get over it. 

My brother is here for four weeks now. He's not found a job yet, and is starting to annoy me a lot. I know I could be more supportive, but the way his first two weeks went here, I just can't be bothered. He has to try harder, but he is not doing anything. This morning my flatmate was asking him if I'm at work, and he replied not yet. I was raging! He sits about the house all fuckin day, and I am home one day in I have no idea how long. He still hasn't fucking learned that I'm off every Saturday. I know it's a little thing, but all this shit is piling up, and I keep it in, because I know he is my bro and I can't be a bitch. I wish he was actually looking for a job. FUCK!!! He's not doing anything. How does he not understand that I can't fucking keep supporting him? 

 

I Believe In..

One day I shall write about my life. And then I shall decide where to start and where to end the story. However, until then I have decided to change my life (again), not crucially, but just a bit. Today I shall post about the things I believe in. Yes, I will not cram about the things that I dislike, or things I don't believe in. I will try to list some things, and then write what I mean by that.
Before I do that I'd like to state a stupidity that I have committed. I always wait for the dude to send me a text message. And it used to be that I was so silly and answered right away, and so placing myself in the same situation - the waiting area. But lately things have slightly changed. I still wait for the guy to send a message, but when he does, I ignore it. I knew I would ignore it in the first place, but I still wait for a something. Last night (a Friday, as you could have guessed anyway) one guy sent a text message. Quite frankly I didn't even see that one coming. But then somewhere between 3 and 4 am GUESS-WHO called. Of course I did not pick up. Was he trying to get back at me for that one time....... Or was he trying to get back at me for not replying to his last two messages? OR was he actually hoping to see me?? Either way, I am not going to do anything about it.

Ok, now that that's out of the way, I can list some things that I believe in.

First, and far most important thing, I believe in my twin brother. You'd maybe expect me to write family and friends or something of that sort. And you are probably wondering why I am picking out just one person of this so-called group. The reason is that I don't believe in nor my family, nor my friends. However, I do believe in my twin bro. Not because he has trouble believing in himself, but because I really think that he can do more that what he is doing right now. I believe in him because I know what kind of a person he is, and I know that when someone wants something real, real bad, they can achieve it. He simply has not understood what it is that he wants to aim for. It is possible that I believe in him just to some how keep believing in myself; all because at some level we are in the same place. And who knows, maybe it is cuz we are twins, or maybe it's the upbringing, or maybe it's all the possible factors added together. But we are both struggling, each due to different list of things.. And gosh, I know this person, I know the deepest corner of his heart. I know he is strong. I know he leads his life with love and passion (gosh, this sounds lame).. But that is the truth.

So we lead in to the next thing: I believe in the GOOD. Yes, the good. I believe that there are people on this planet who are not entirely self centered. I believe that some people in the world would die to save another being. Of course, there isn't only back and white (sometimes I forget this), we all have our vices, and our falling point. But some people simply care less about themselves and more about others (or someone else in specific). It really doesn't matter, as long as the person doesn't spend his/her entire life just concerning about himself/herself.. I lost the train of thought... OOooppsss. I believe in Santa Claus. :D

I believe in art, all forms of art really. Painting, sports, photography, dance, singing, cooking, crafts, visual arts, modern art, art of design, art of work, art of structure, art or anything a person can be good at, anything  that a person can do so good that it can be admired.

(I need to remember how to project my thoughts into decent sentences and paragraphs.)

I could list some more things, but I'll just go with one more.

I believe in good night sleep. ;)

Why I Will Not Text Back

I know that even if I really do message him back, I am going to be the one waiting on his response. And maaaan, it is a pain in ass to be forced to check your phone after every 5 minutes just to see that there are no new messages. Therefore I will not text him back. It's just not worth it.

Fragment from wczoraj*

Him: Ok :-P but no kissing the boys, no nothing :-P
Me: Why not? :P
Him: Coz ill be jealous



Text messages kill!



*wczoraj means 'yesterday' in Polish