You Want to See More

So now I have created a new blog where you will see some things from our trip.

Cycling in South East Asia

From Here to There

November finally arrived. But before that end of October happened. On the last Wednesday of October I went to "trim" my hair. It is now half the length it was. (It is still long though!)

On Thursday it was a tough day at uni. But after that I had a nice lunch with a couple of my friends. Then later, in the evening, I was visiting my brother for his birthday dinner. It was great to see my niece again. She is growing rapidly. We stayed there till late and were home a bit after midnight. It ended up being a long night with packing, shower, doing laundry, and tiding up the mess I had produced in the last few months. I got to bed at six in the morning. My alarm was set for 7:30. I woke up 5 minutes before it went off.

Now it was Friday, the very day that I was patiently waiting for. That's the day when, what should be the greatest trip if my life so far, was about to begin. I flew to Lisbon to see my boyfriend. He was waiting for me at the arrivals, with a flower! :) We seized the last bit of the day we had by going a bit out in the city. Again, arriving after midnight home, we started packing, this time Pedro's things. It went a bit hectic, but by four in the morning we were fast asleep.

With most things packed we let ourselves sleep so we would be somewhat rested for our first flight together. With everything ready to go, bags and bikes packed, Pedro went to get his father and then we drove to the airport. At the check in we had a bit of a scare, the lady at the Emirates desk said that I could only get a 15 day visa for our final destination, so she could not. Check us in because we had our return flights only in 5 weeks. But luckily we had purchased another flight for us for while on the trip, so we had theoretical proof that we'll be leaving Thailand before the 15 days expire. With all that settled we now had to pass our bikes through the oversized luggage scanner, and help the woman working there bring the bike boxes to the other side. :D  We then bought some wine and headed for our gate. The flight was long, more than seven hours. And at Dubai we were not able to land because the airport was busy, so we took an extra minutes just circulating above Dubai. We landed passed two at night local time. Luckily our CS host Jihad was still waiting for us at the airport to take us to his place. With him was another surfer, Vaidas. This guy is from Lithuania, but has also lived in Norway, and in Canada for several years. Now he was on his journey to see every country in the world!! At our host's place we had a quick chat but soon went to sleep. It had been a long day!

We all slept in even though that was not the plan. We planned to leave the apartment by 10, but Jihad had to be in work. He had called work that he would be late, but because he sounded ill, his colleague said to stay home for the day. So now he was our awesome "sick" driver and tour guide. He really turned out to be one of the best hosts ever! Impressive!
We got to see some of Dubai. Before our flight we met an old colleague of Pedro's, had a nice quick dinner. And then our host drove us to the airport. We found our terminal, our boarding gate, and we were ready to take off for Bangkok!

And that is where we are right now. :)

4. oktobris

12. saeimas vēlēšanas. 

Izdrāzti cilvēki no augšas līdz apakšai. 

Patiešām pretīgi!

Teju visiem kanditātiem es saku šo:

The End!

Wake Me Up When September Ends

September has floated away, it poured through the capsule of time like a raging waterfall. Seems that yesterday it begun and tomorrow's already October. The leaves are turning into countless unnamed colours. The sky is filled with clouds. Darkness falls in way too soon in the evenings and leaves much too late when the mornings come. At times I feel that the sun is playing an impossible game of hide and seek; there's no way of winning. I want to stop the time, if just for some seconds. I need to catch a breath. So many things happening all at once, like life is just flying right passed me. At some moments life seems like a train. My train is running in front of my eyes, and I'm not even on it! Can someone pull the emergency brake so I can hop on? Don't I have to be on the ride that's called "My Life"?

Now Playing: James Blunt - Tears and Rain

 

What is your soul made of? How far can someone go? How deep can one dig to find the truth? It scares me, it scares me that I might live just the one layer of this life, just the basic path to the grave. The idea of it makes me want to run free, run like a wild animal. I want to be able to think like a regular human being. Sometimes. Just sometimes I want to be like the rest of them. But the rest of the time I simply enjoy the complexity of it, makes me feel ... happy. (It's funny, because the exact same thing used to make me terribly sad.)

Bam! Too much thinking. Back to the basics - September's gone. This one, at least. Start of uni's over, birthday has passed, Scotland stays as a part of UK, war-like situation in Ukraine, utter shame on humanity in the Middle East... Ah, list goes on and on, September has been fairly eventful this year. Let's see what Mr October has in store for us!

Doing This and Doing That

For the first time ever, I truly can not explain my own actions. Usually everything I do made some sense on some sort of  (maybe even messed up) level. But now, now, now... it's a mayor mystery and it's beginning to bother me a lot.

Now Playing: The Doors - Riders On the Storm

State of Mind of Travel

Makes almost zero sense, the title I mean. BUT, as there always is a but, I am almost certain that I can explain what I mean.
There are several categories of travellers. But firs let's make general classifications. There's people who hate to travel, people who simply hate the idea of travelling, they feel safe and comfortable where they are, and travel causes them stress, discomfort, disorientation and general confusion. Unless necessary for survival, they choose to stay put in their space. Now I used to think that this is closed mindedness; I used to think that people who dislike travelling are simply too cool to see beyond their white-picket fence. However, I've met people who are well-educated about the world, people who do see the world beyond, but simply don't want to go there. They see it through history, through books, magazines, internet, TV, even from people who travel to them.... etc. And a wise person can get the gist of what a place is like by actually collecting information from various sources, and that is as far as their curiosity goes.
(As for me, the more I learn about a place the more tempted I am to see it in person!)
It used to be difficult for me to think that there are people who don't like travelling, since I want to see every corner of this world and even beyond. But a little questioning and inquisition gave me some insight in their way of thinking; to my surprise I can even understand it.
However, I can't skip the fact that there are people who don't travel because they are stubborn, and they refuse to even acknowledge that there is life beyond their corner of this universe. In my opinion, I can just let them be, because that kind of mind set is difficult to influence. But who knows, maybe it is healthier to not be curious about the world...never know.
Then there is the occasional traveller. They will travel once in a few years or once a year, and it will most likely be to visit old friends or distant relatives. They go to pretty much the same places, book the same airline company, already have the necessary currency from five years ago, when at the destination they see the same places and comment on how much it has or hasn't changed, they eat at the same restaurants as previous time, and they even order the same food. This is because they have been there, done that, there is plenty of certainty and they don't have to step outside their comfort zone too much. I will also place the all-inclusive type of travellers in this category. While they might go to some new places, they still travel occasionally and the comfort zone too is not flexible. They love the idea that you pay one fixed price, and you are pretty much carried from home to hotel and back. All they have to remember is to go relieve themselves when necessary. Also under this category I'll place the tag-along type of people. Someone invited them on a trip because they had a free spot, or had no one else to go with.. or a similar story. Now this category is most likely to complain if something is not as they expected, or something is different than it was. They hate surprises, they want it they way it was listed out for them/ the way they expected it to be.
There is the chance travellers. Their day-to-day schedule is so flexible that they could run away at any time of the day for any duration of time. Personally, I envy these type of people. While I myself am pretty flexible, there are certain things I can't run away from. So I can not always buy tickets one day before departure. These people have their e-mails full of news letters form various travel sites and airline companies. They find deals online, or from some place they are a member of. Maybe their friend had a free spot for a weeks long trip down South to go sunbathing, or to go up North to watch the Northern lights and chill in sauna for countless days. They are definitely not afraid to say YES! to any offer that flies at them. They have magical source of income, and all you see/hear is that they are yet at another corner of the world doing yet another random activity.
Then there is the party travellers, they don't care when they go, where they go, or who they go with, as long as there is booze, music, and maybe some other unknown substances, they will go there. They pack light, but they might have too much alcohol in their pannier and the other substance hidden in their shoes. You should be careful if you choose to travel with this type of person. He/she might cause you unnecessary troubles. Best solution would be to pretend to not know this person while going through airport security. Be even more careful if there's a dog or two with he guards. But on the location these peeps are loads of fun, they attract the best people in the area (best people for partying that is), and they somehow end up at the best places where to chill out all night long. Then they crash where-ever so you end up not spending a dime for accommodation. They will drain all your energy and you will be thankful for it.
There is also the solo-traveller, He/she can be a bit of everything, they might be in it for the fun, for new sightseeing places, for museums and galleries, or to meet local people they have never met before (and probably will never meet them again after their encounter). They don't mind travelling alone, quite the opposite, they love the freedom it gives. No need to arrange plans or argue about what to see next. They are flexible in a way that they will arrange the vacation so it is convenient for them, and why not, right?

Here is where the state of mind comes in. Almost 24/7 I think about travelling. I think about future travels, passed travels, possible travel plans, about types of travellers, about what kind of traveller I am, about the best way to travel, about special deals, about who to travel with.... etc.
Some people think of money, of work, of school, of family... my mind is primarily occupied with thoughts about travel. That's all for now. There is a good chance that I will post more about this.

The more I travel - the more I want to travel.

Don't Wake Me Up

If I actually do fall asleep in September, make sure to not wake me up.
I can't think straight. I honestly need some REAL rest from everything, yes - every fucking thing. I'm way too exhausted to be functioning as a real human being. I am physically and emotionally tired. I need space. I need time. I need to manage my time, so I can rest.
I have to decide what to do...

This is That

I came across this song on another blog, there's something to it that caught my ear:

Jan Lauwers & Needcompany - Song for Budhanton

Or, as the person in THE blog calls it - 3 flops in a row.

Dialogs ar sevi.

-Ko tu dari?
-Es nezinu.
-Kāpēc tu tā dari?
-Es nezinu.
-Ko tu centies panākt?
-Gribu nepatikšanas. 

Vēlētos satikt īsto Mazo Princi un Pieradināto Lapsu!

I've Lost My Superpowers

It seems that I have lost my superpowers. I have looked everywhere for them, but can't seem to find them. Looked in all shelves, in all drawers, behind walls, all secret places, checked it on google. Of course I also went through the city, looked into every brick, in case they were hiding in there.

Honestly, this has never happened before, I tried calling them, but they wont pick up. Should I make a MISSING poster and place it across the city? Should I notify the police? Has anyone had such accident before? Suggestions?

Meanwhile I have to live a regular life, like the most of you do. Sad.

BUT if you stumble upon my superpowers, do not use them, as you will only put yourself and others in danger. Consider yourself warned!
Instead, return them to me where they rightfully belong. 

The Woman Without a Shadow

Today I saw a woman without a shadow. She was wearing a purple summer dress. It had a charming flower pattern, and was tied with a thin belt around her waist. She looked nothing but beautiful. As I was in a hurry to where-ever human might be in a rush to, she passed right by me. I would assume she had to be running, the speed was unnatural. But no, she danced by me in a silent melody, almost as if flying by in a plane. She had wings, I believe. How else would you explain that this woman had no shadow?
As I hurried down the side of the road, for that moment I had forgotten where I was going or why I was headed there. I could not stop wonder - what a mystery!
She had a smile of a wild berry. Her cheeks were so pale that for a moment I thought there was snow in summer. Her cute short hair made her look a bit like Amélie. But her eyes were in flames. It was difficult to compute if she was mad as a hurricane or full of pure joy. Her lips were so thin, you could barely tell she had any, they were in a wicked arc, but almost a straight horizontal line. Could not tell if that was a smile or grin.
The moment passed, she had flown passed me in a second. And as I kept up with my pace, there was no way in catching her. There was no way to stop her just for a flash to ask her: "where did your shadow go?"

But then, maybe she never had a shadow, maybe she always has had those wings, ever since she was born.. and she has no idea what it is like to have a shadow. Maybe she is actually in a different reality, but somehow she shines right through all the laws of infinity. Maybe she was lost.. lost on purpose. There's a chance she was chasing someone.. or someone was chasing her!
Was she in danger? Was she an angel being chased by demons? She could have been the demon herself.
Or was she simply aimlessly roaming the streets of my city?

Let's Go For a Swim

How much would you be willing to give away for the one thing you want the most?
Your money, home, freedom, health, friend, family, happy moments, memories, time, ...
Does that not make you question the things you truly want? Don't you have the things you really "want"?

It's like wanting to know how to swim only when you're in water. It's like being able to talk when you have an important message to tell. It's like being able to run when you need to catch that last bus.

But, hey, why bother to appreciate your swimming skill when clearly you're always on the shore, right?

..or maybe..

Fata Morgana

It's like in the story of the devil and the boy. They were counting to ten, and before they even begun I could tell you that the devil will cheat and that the boy will lose. But how does it really work? Don't you become the loser the moment you break the rules? How about the unwritten rules? Either way, the boy lost and his soul was probably transferred into devil's account. Not that the kid gave a fuck anyway.

So from here we lose count. It doesn't matter what we were counting, why we were counting, ... All that is just useless background information. It's like a mirage, it's there, but it isn't. It's a fata morgana. Illusions appear in our lives without special invitations, they just come and go as they please. The uncomfortable part is that we don't always know if things are real or not. Mostly we assume that everything is either real (like a young child would), or we assume that everything is fake (like a pessimist would). This brings us to a question - in this story, was the devil real? Or was he real only because the perspective we had was that of a kid. Maybe the devil was never there! (?)

Just another Job Interview

In the past few months I have attended some job interviews. Most were to actually try to get into a different job, some were just for the sport of it.
Here I am writing to say that I do have an opinion. It is up to the interviewee to be ready for the the big day, the big appointment, the big meeting. That is true, for sure! It takes time to get ready for an interview, doing some company research, practising questions and answers, reminding oneself of good manners, practising good speech... figuring out what to wear, how to look, what shoes to wear, what jacket to put on if any, deciding how to get to the right place at the right(!) time...
We all know that the list goes on and on, and each and every one of us has certain things we know we need more time for.

Whilst doing company research (if it is known before hand, of course), we mostly check out their web-page. This is wise and common as most companies do have websites nowadays. Usually they'll have the crucial facts there, often much more. Your mission is to, at least, know the basic, so you are able to explain what the company is. Know the name, location(s), industry, basic goals, any specifics...etc. While we're on this topic, it is also very important to know about the position that you've applied for, know what will be your basic tasks, your duties, work schedule, anything you can find out. If necessary, jot down some notes for yourself.

If you haven't done this until now, then you should most definitely google search the most common interview questions. And while you're at it, also search for tips on how to answer the questions. Even if you think you know what to say, it's good to just see what out there. Very often such online articles are written by people who do recruitment, so they know what they are saying.
I do want to mention some questions you should be ready to answer at any time.
You have to know what are your strengths and weaknesses. If you are not certain of what they are, think of something you're doing now (school/collage/other job/anything) and think what things are easy for you, simple, and what are things that are tougher. You can also take some of those silly online personality tests (they don't even have to be the big, long, broad and extensive ones), in the results they often display what are your personalities pros and cons. It's better than nothing (i.e. better than answering I don't know).
Another important question - where do you see yourself in five years? Now, you do not have to have a detailed plan of your every day within the next five years (that would be very strange, may I add). But you should have some kind of vision of what you think you'll be doing, where will you want to be career wise. Again, say something, anything but I don't know.
To get my point across, there is nothing you "don't know," you should avoid saying that. It comes across as if you're insecure, unsure, unstable, unreliable, ...etc. And nobody wants that kind of person as their employee.
Practise all sorts of questions. You could even role-play an interview with a friend, or any other human being.

As for good manners. The most, MOST important one is to be on time! NO! Not ON time, you MUST be there some minutes before the actual time. Firstly, you have to have some extra minutes just in case you miss that bus, you get lost, you get in traffic, or you forgot something at home.... Leave some spare minutes so you don't have to be in rush, even if something unexpected happens. Second, you just have to be there 10-15 minutes early. It gives you time to catch a breath, to get a look around (if possible), to relax a bit before the tyrants eat you up alive...
As for other manners, you know the basic communication. Don't speak while someone else is speaking, don't yell, shout or get angry. But don't be totally quiet either, they need to hear what you have to say (that's why you're there after all).
That's it, I'd feel embarrassed if I had to say anything more.

We all know very well that the first impression forms a great deal of your character - the one that they will see. You have to look good. Some time ago on a website I read that you have to look about 10% better than the person who is interviewing you. You have to show that you know how to dress appropriately. You really do have to look good! There are some fancy-pancy researches that say what colours leave a better impression, etc, etc, etc. You can go ahead and research it. But in the end of the day you're gonna wear something you already have. Also, wear something you're comfortable in, something that is the right size - not too big, not too small-too tight. In other words, wear something that will not cause unnecessary discomfort. You do have to make sure the clothing is clean, ironed, not worn-out... These are simple things, you don't want to look sloppy.
Also, put jewellery that will not be too flashy, disturbing, or send wrong message (big no, no are any discriminating signs). Stay classy! This one goes out mostly to women, watch your make-up level!

While at the interview you just have to go along with the cliché - be honest! YES! It's been said countless time before and it will be said countless times in the future - be honest. Don't lie, don't make up things, don't say something just because it would sound cool if it's not true. Stand by what you say, don't say one thing and then the total opposite. Show a good character that you have, like a good sense of humour. You don't have to be laughing all the time, but just a pinch of humour here and there will do it. If you're talkative, make sure you don't talk rubbish. If you're a serious person, that too can be well presented in the interview.

Also, the interviewer is not the only one asking questions!!! You have to go with some questions prepared, and think of questions along the way. If you have no questions, it means that you don't care. But you do care! So ask away.

I should also note that in the past few interviews I've had very often (WAY TOO often) the people interviewing me haven't actually read my CV! They get paid to interview me! I spend my time to get ready, to go there, and to spend the time for the actual interview... and they can't even bother to read two pages of clearly laid out information. It is, what, 600 words tops! Is it really so hard??? How do I know this - I mention something that's on my CV as a matter of fact, and they are suddenly surprised and re-asking me. As if I have to lean over and point my finger into the page that is standing right in front of them. I know it's a century where time is money, but if I spend the time to go to the interview, then they should have at least the decency to read what they have.
My point being, at times it is important to mention something you've noted in your CV and you really want them to know.  Just saying.

Remember, your time is limited. (Most of the time) you will not know how many other candidates they are interviewing for the same position, so you have to stand out. There has to be something to your character that they end up thinking THAT guy/gal, yeah she was something. (And when I say - stand out - I don't mean in a bad way, leave a positive impression!)

At the end of the day you want to be remembered as the perfect future employee!

Real Eyes

This is what the Lisboa (Lisbon) streets teach nowadays.

Real Eyes Realize Real Lies
Lisbon

Never Old

Marilyn Monroe is forever young. 

There is no doubt that she was a fascinating your lady in her time. She was fabulous. She was broken-hearted, always in lack of love. Maybe that's what made her so appealing.
But one of the reasons why she is still such a Diva nowadays is that she died young. This was crime of her life, and also the event that made her live forever.
That's what we all know - she was young and fabulous, and so she remains as a woman under 36.

"Admired by men, envied by women."

From her last photo shoot with Bert Stern

 six weeks before August 5th, 1962.

Multiple Universes

We live in multiple universes, in multiple realities. That is the truth! We each see the world via a different lens. It's strange when you really wrap your head around it. You suddenly feel all alone, because the truth is, you are alone in your own world. Earth, most literally, becomes a scary place to live in. Like back when you were a child, even closing your eyes was scary. When you come to think about it, the earth really is just like a dream world. We each live in our own, and somehow assume that everyone else lives in the same one, or some place similar to it. Further more, we tend to fool ourselves that we can relate (or better yet, understand) how the other person is experiencing life.
The truth is, there are countless realities, parallel realities, if I may. They co-exist because the choice is not that big, they just have to co-exist.

 Now Playing: Lorde - Royal

You Know Who You Are

I love you because you are awesome,
..you are awesome because I love you!




If I could build a fortress with my bare hands. If I could build a whole palace, just me all by myself.. Would I?
There are infinite questions, and just as many answers (if not even more). But which answer belongs to witch question? I wonder if it is even possible to build a whole fortress by myself.
Would I have enough strength? Who would sponsor it? Would I have to earn it all, just me? Wouldn't I have to learn about building, construction, architecture and all that jazz?

Or could I just get up, take all I need form where ever it can be found, and start building it where ever I feel like doing so?

When you break every day things into tiny details, into steps, when you elaborate the seemingly simple things, it becomes clear that it is not really as simple as might look.

We're not always allowed to do the things we desire just because we desire them. We are forced to think of the other factors. We are forced to think of consequences. We have to think about the others, what will happen to them, how will a certain action affect others.

And sometimes it isn't so easy to just say/write I don't care.
Surprise, surprise. 
I suppose that there are times when I do care.



I'm too tired to think.
I'm too lazy to be bothered to pre-read this post before posting.
I should, since I wrote it over a course of several hours,
but don't want to.
Bite me! 

May, Wait, What, June?

Ok, if I was to have a child now I'd call it June, because it came unexpectedly.

Ha, bad humour stops here.

Dear Bob,

I own you an apology. I know it's been a while, but they say it's better late than never, so here is my apology. Bob (if that even is your real name), we met a very long time ago. Some years back. It was when I was still living in Ottawa. You most likely don't recall but we met in Rideau Center shopping mall in the food court. That day we both were there to attend an improv-everywhere event, the banana war. Remember now? Yes, it was funny, hilarious even. Random people shooting each other with bananas.

And so I found it, your iPod. Yes! It was me, I took it home, I could have went looking for you, Bob, but I didn't. I just swiftly put it in my pocket.
For four years I never touched it, never even tried to switch in on. And then one fine day, thousands miles away from Ottawa, I charged that little thing, and now it's me who is listening to all those songs on your list.

I bet you went looking for it on that day. But I want to apologize. And I want to thank you, Bob! Yeah, I like the small blue thingy, I think it will become a good friend of mine, and my laptop. Yeah, we'll all be good friend. But not you, only a tiny ghost of you remains.

But Bob, why is the memory space so small, huh?

Never yours,
me.

P.S. Clearly, I won this banana war.

SONGS II

In the past few weeks (ever since I puplished SONGS I) I have been compelling a list of songs that bring back good memories, or songs that I simply like a lot. So here is what I have for now minus the ones I have already posed in SONGS I.
Again, there will be no order to them, just a list of songs.

Evanescence - Bring me to life
Daft Punk - Get Lucky
Harry Nilsson - Put The Lime In The Coconut
Maroon 5 ft. Christina Aguilera - Moves Like Jagger
Robin Thicke ft. T.I., Pharrell - Blurred Lines
ABBA - Mamma Mia
Meat Loaf - I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)
Avril Lavigne - Sk8er Boi
Avril Lavigne - Complicated
Anastacia - Left Outside Alone
Flo Rida - Good Feeling
Ugly Kid Joe - Cats In The Cradle
Katzenjammer - A Bar In Amsterdam
Lori Liberman - Killing Me Softly With His Song
Peter Gabriel - Sledgehammer
Bryan Adams - Please Forgive Me
Prince - Purple Rain
UB40 - Red Red Wine
Eminem - Superman
The Police - Every Breath You Take
Guano Apes - Open Your Eyes
Marc Cohn - Walking In Memphis
Toy-Box - Tarzan & Jane
Shakira ft. Alejandro Sanz - La Tortura
Nancy Sinatra - Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down)
Takida - Curly Sue
John Legend - All Of Me
Nancy Sinatra - These Boots Are Made for Walkin'
Status Quo - In The Army Now
Alice Cooper - Poison
B.o.B ft. Hayley Williams - Airplanes
No Doubt - Don't Speak
Antonio Banderas & Los Lobos - Canción Del Mariachi
Joan Osborne - One of Us
Madonna - You'll See
Roxette - Queen Of Rain
Roxette - Real Sugar
The Cheeky Girls - Take Your Shoes Off
Toni Braxton - Un-Break My Heart
Gorillaz - Clint Eastwood
ABBA - Take A Chance On Me
Sinéad O'Connor - Nothing Compares 2U
Björk - It's Oh So Quiet
Vengaboys - Boom, Boom, Boom, Boom!!
Hoobastank - The Reason
Alien Ant Farm - Smooth Criminal
Spice Girls - Wannabe
Britney Spears - Oops! I Did It Again
Annie Lennox - No More 'I Love You's'
Whitney Houston - I Have Nothing
Ruslana - Wild Dances
Loreen - Euphoria
R.E.M. - Orange Crush
OK Go - Here It Goes Again
Kings Of Leon - Sex on Fire
The Black Eyed Peas - Where Is The Love?
Robbie Williams - Feel
John Lennon - Imagine
Mary J. Blige, U2 - One
Europe - The Final Countdown
Gareth Gates - Anyone Of Us (Stupid Mistake)
Joan Jett & the Blackhearts - I Love Rock N Roll
Avicii - Hey Brother
Queen - Bohemian Rhapsody
Alanis Morissette - Ironic
Labrinth ft. Tinie Tempah - Earthquake
Christina Perri - Jar of Hearts
Evanescence - My Immortal
The Verve - Bitter Sweet Symphony
Lana Del Rey - Summertime Sadness 
Pitbull ft. Ne-Yo, Afrojack, Nayer - Give Me Everything 
Modestep - Sunlight
Metallica - Whiskey In The Jar
Sean Paul - She Doesn't Mind
Rihanna Ft. Jay-Z - Umbrella
Bruno Mars - When I Was Your Man
Lady Gaga - The Edge Of Glory
Stings - Fields Of Gold
Smash Mouth - All Star
Christina Aguilera, Lil' Kim, Mya, Pink - Lady Marmalade
Adele - Chasing Pavements
Etta James - I Just Want To Make Love To You
Imagine Dragons - Radioactive
OneRepublic - Counting Stars
OneRepublic - Stop And Stare
Shakira ft. Rihanna - Can't Remember to Forget You
Calvin Harris ft. Ellie Goulding - I Need Your Love
Johnny Cash - Hurt
Johnny Cash - Ring Of Fire
David Guetta ft. Nicki Minaj - Turn Me On
Jennifer Lopez ft. Pitbull - On The Floor
Rihanna ft. Calvin Harris - We Found Love
Paul Simon - You Can Call Me Al
Spin Doctors - Two Princes
Lady Antebellum - Need You Now
Amy Macdonald - This Is The Life
Icona Pop ft. Charli XCX - I Love It
Cyndi Lauper - Girls Just Want To Have Fun
Ed Sheeran - The A Team
Owl City - Fireflies
Ed Sheeran - Lego House
Tim Berg - Seek Bromance
Florence + The Machine - Dog Days Are Over
LMFAO - Sexy And I Know It
Adele - Rolling In The Deep
Kelly Clarkson - Because Of You
Christina Perri - A Thousand Years
Swedish House Mafia ft. Tinie Tempah - Miami 2 Ibiza
Justin Timberlake - Mirrors
Flo Rida ft. David Guetta - Club Can't Handle Me
O-Zone - Dragostea Din Tei
Elvis Presley - Jailhouse Rock
Rihanna - Diamonds
Rihanna - Pon The Replay
Bloodhound Gang - The Bad Touch
Red Hot Chilli Peppers - Californication
King Charles - Love Lust
Queen - Bicycle Race
Flobots - Handlebars
Sting - Englishman In New York
Natalie Imbruglia - Torn
Tina Turner - What's Love Got To Do With It
Scorpions - Wind Of Change
Eagles - Hotel California
Bryan Adams - Summer of 69
Bon Jovi - Livin' On A Prayer
Michael Jackson - Man In The Mirror
Survivor - Eye Of The Tiger
The Script ft. will.i.am - Hall Of Fame
Mattafix - Big City Life
Coldplay - Paradise
Phil Collins - In The Air Tonight
Midnight Oil - Beds Are Burning
Oasis - Wonderwall
Lenny Kravitz - American Woman
The Beatles - Yesterday
John Denver - Leaving on a Jet Plane
Ray Charles - Hit The Road Jack
Slash ft. Fergie - Beautiful Dangerous
Terrorvision - Tequilla
K'Naan - Wavin' Flag
Depeche Mode - Free Love
Matchbox Twenty - How Far We've Come
Shakira - Waka Waka
Los Del Rio - Macarena
Loona - Bailando
Crazy Frog - Axel F
Fall Out Boy - My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark (Light Em Up)






Thant's all --- For now! ;)

What am I doing?

HOW I FEEL - ALL AT THE SAME TIME:

 

AND THIS: 

The Weak Boys

The weak boys that pretend to be strong.
And..
The strong boys that pretend to be weak.

There are the two categories that men can be classified in. Yes, we're not supposed to classify people in groups, generalize. But then again, our lives pivot around the idea that we belong to certain groups.
We identify ourselves based on what we are and what we have been taught that we are. I am a girl, so I put myself in the girl-group. Then it goes on based on race and ethnicity. Next on is the income group, where are we -what social group do we belong in? The list goes on, based on interests, based on religious and political views. Ultimately we place ourselves in groups, and in the end it it one group in specific that means the most to us. And then I question, who am I? 

And who are you? What is the most important thing to you? Who do you want people to see first?

???

Would you run away with me?

This.

Letter

Dear,

It's hard to be here so far away from you. I am distancing myself, it's a defence mechanism, there is nothing I can do to stop it. When I'm with you, I'm there 100% and more. When we're together I embrace every second I'm there. I smile at you so much it hurts my cheeks. The day blends together with night, there is no time; it's just moments we get to spend together. 

I go through my day thinking about you. I wonder what I would be telling you now, or how I'd be playing with your hair. I fly away remembering how beautiful your kisses feel.

But then I trail away to reality - I'm here, and you're there - far away. And I wonder what you are doing, what you are not telling me, and what you are telling me. I wonder how tough is work for you, and how evil your boss is this day. I wonder how your family is doing. I wonder if all the things you tell me are true. I wonder about when I might see you again.. That is, of course, if I ever will see you again. I wonder how badly I want to see you smile. And then, again, I wonder if all that is the truth. 

I want to quit, and I want to leave it be. But then again, I don't want to hurt you (that is, if all what you say is the truth). I thought I could handle this, I thought it would be so much easier, but it's not. And as time goes by, it only becomes harder to bare. I want to smile when I think of you, but yet there is this tiny tear that meets the corners of my eyes. I dream for all the adventures we might be going on, but then I think of how I will back out on the last moment. I dream. Yes, lately you've even showed up in my dreams, and then I wake up all rested in the morning. I wake up well, but then I open my eyes and you're not there next to me. You're far, far away. 

I wish I had the strength to tell you this, because there are so very little things that are left unsaid. I feel well with you, and I feel like I can actually trust you. But then there are moments when doubt arises and it brings me to tears. Everything is so uncertain. 

But I will stay here, at times I'll be all for you, but other times I'll let a call from you go astray, even though hearing your voice is like a raindrop in a desert.

I'm here now, 

but I believe it will not be for long,

truly yours... 

I can feel myself going crazy

I feel my brain melting to bits, day by day it decays.

Nenogurt

Kā zvaigžņota lupata man virs galvas plešas debesu valstība. Es esmu aizkustināta. Ir vēss, piebrieduši krūšu gali un es viegli, jo viegli teku pār lauku. Kājas basas, rasa dzeļ pēdās, bet es tik gaisīgi nesos, gandrīz kā lidojumā. Man nav kurp skriet, nav laika, sen iztecējis, vai varbūt nekad tāds nemaz nav bijis. Es esmu vienīgā dambretes dāma - karaliene pati savā pļavā, un neviens man pāri nodarīt nevar. Es elsoju klusi, jo klusi; ir nogurums no nemitīgās dancošanas, bet es nevaru stāties. Es negribu stāties. Man uzsmaida mēness gaišā puse, vai tas ņirgājās, vai patiesi smaida, nezinu. Bet ko gan tas maina? Es esmu karaliene pati savā pļavā. Ir robežas, sēta laikam arī kaut kur ir, bet es nezinu cik tālu. Bieži šķiet, ka teku pa pļavu, kas ir apaļa kā lode, bez malām, bez gala.

This is Rubbish

This will be me ranting, consider yourself warned. 

I'm at work now.
This place is seriously starting to get on my nerves. I don't even know where to start.
I'm not sure if I've mentioned this, but I work at a hotel as a receptionist. I've been here since end of summer. The job is really fine, I have a list of responsibilities, not just one task to do over and over again. During night shifts I also have to prepare the breakfast. I also have to work in the restaurant as a waitress. And when there is no chef in, then I also have to make food for people. Now this is where the rant starts. Two people went to the restaurant, I tell them that there is no chef in, however, I can prepare something for them form the weekend menu. Now they make a face that makes me think that I've told them something so offensive that they are about to get up and walk away without saying a thing. But no, they just sit there with their... unhappy eggplant faces and unwillingly start to view the Weekend menu. Why the un-satisfaction is aimed at me? Is it my fault that the hotel is low on money? Is it my fault that they can't afford a chef for all times? Is it my fault that due to lack of clients it is inefficient to have the chef in? Yeah, I didn't think so!
Meanwhile I'm hoping they don't pick something that we don't actually have available. In a lucky case, they do pick something I have in the kitchen. Then I ask for drinks. There can be various scenarios;
1) They ask for beer, I ask what kind of beer. Many of them then ask something that they know (example, Carlsberg) - sorry, we don't have that, I can offer you some Latvian beers. - Emm, ok. - Then I usually ask if the want dark or light, and they usually don't know what they want. Other times they ask for draft beer, which is also something we don't have. Then often I bring them the first beer (the brand doesn't matter, as tastes vary from person to person), and they don't like it, and ask something different next time. And then for the third beer they go back to option one, assuming that every next beer I'd offer them would be worse and worse.
2) They ask for coffee or tea. That's not as difficult. The tea simply takes more time, as I need to boil hot water. But then there is no tea that they want. Then they say they don't want sugar, but turns out they wanted it after all, same story with milk.
3) They ask for something that I don't have (and that isn't even in the menu) - for example - fresh juice - any juice other than apple or orange - smoothies - ice cream cocktails - some other random drink.
4) They ask for spirit with something. Well, I am still not aware as to what goes in what glass. Then there is also the issue of lack of right sized glasses. I believe there is about two glasses that fit a shot with a full small glass bottle of coke in it - and they are always dirty. Same thing with G&T, I know I should pour the two together, but I don't have such a glass that fits it all!!!
5) They ask for just water, I believe that in any normal place they'd bring water for no charge, but we give the small bottles, there is 300something ml (or 400somthing, I don't care TBH), and then sometimes they are unhappy that I charge them for water.
6) Cola! Yeah, the cola problem is that about 50% of the time there is no coca cola available, because it is the most requested drink and finishes very fast once delivered. So here the question is, why not order more?? You gain more in the long run!!!
So then they pick something to eat, salad, soup or some hot dish, what ever it is, I have to go and make it for them. But wait! Who's doing my real job? Who's working at the reception, you may wonder! It's me! I'm supposed to be everywhere doing everything.
Now here is more bullshit - the reception is open 24/7, for guests that is ideal! But for us, not so much. There is a lot to do in the morning, and a lot in the evening. But middle of the night and middle of the day are usually quiet and there is nothing to do. So you sit on your ass for some hours and then you have to run like a horse for the rest of the time.
I often get comments form the guests asking/wondering how it is that I am all alone and have to do all the tasks. Well, I wonder too!

And who knows? Maybe it's time to get a new job?! I work hard, and I really try to do things well, but the thing is that nobody cares, no one seems to notice that you do so much. And the salary is an absolute joke! It's like a spit in the face. I can't imagine how I'd survive if I was living all by myself. It would be a nightmare.

Anyway, my shift is over in ten minutes. Then I'm going home for some sleep, since I've not had a normal night sleep for a week now. Oh, my colleague will be late, isn't life great?!

Fuck weekends. Fuck work. Fuck men. Fuck people. Fuck music. Fuck the sunlight. Fuck the moon and the tides. Fuck the polluted oceans. Fuck life and fuck death. Fuck all this bullshit.

I'm not satisfied with life today and everything seems to be wrong, everything makes me sad.
I don't even want to apologize for all the swearing.

--Basta.

No Boundaries

Have you ever taken a look at the world map and felt like there is virtually nothing holding you back from just picking a spot and going there? Well, things are the way they are at the moment, and I truly feel that some time this year I will be able to go to a random place on this planet Earth.
That is, of course, if everything goes as planned.
Right now I'm looking at life through the simplicity lens, and I can't say that it's bad. It isn't always easy, but in the long run it is definitely better than complicating things and assuming that everything is impossible, too complicated, or too difficult to achieve.
Life is tough, and maybe that's why it's worth living.

SONGS I

There is so much that needs to be said, there are things that are burning inside of me, and they are eager to burst, to see the light of truth. But no! I don't want to share, because not always is sharing caring. There are words, even sentences ready to be born, but I don't let them, I keep them trapped inside. All this because I know that most things are best left unsaid. It's moments like this that I want to shut down and just exist without thinking, without worry. In moments like this I stay silent even if I know it's not the right things to do.
However, when the right moment comes, the right things will be done.

It's sleeping time, but insomnia has taken over. That's why I have spent the last few hours going through songs that for some reason have been close to my heart at one or more moments in my life.
Here is  a list in no order what so ever!

Ben Howard - Promise
Mumford and Sons - Little Lion Man
David Lynch & Lykke Li - I'm Waiting Here
Example - Changed the Way You Kiss Me
Foo Fighters - The Pretender
George Thorogood - Bad To The Bone 
Wintersleep - Smoke
Wintersleep - Weighty Ghost
Wintersleep - Orca
Morgan Page feat Tegan and Sara - Body Work
Tegan and Sara - Where Does the Good Go
Tegan and Sara - Hello
R.E.M. - Leaving New York
R.E.M. - Losing My Religion 
Simon & Garfunkel - I am a Rock
Simon & Garfunkel - Sound of Silence
Simon & Garfunkel - Leaves that are Green
Simon & Garfunkel - Cecillia
Passenger - Feather on the Clyde
Passenger - Let Her Go
Jaymes Young - Northern Lights  
Nelly Furtado - All Good Things (Come To An End)
Amy Winehouse - You Know I'm No Good
Goo Goo Dolls - Iris
Willie Nelson - On the Road Again 
Rednex - Cotton Eye Joe  
Eminem feat. Rihanna - Love the Way You Lie 
Flo Rida feat. Sia - Wild Ones
Don Omar feat Lucenzo - Danza Kuduro
Pitbull feat Chris Brown - International Love
Marc Anthony - You Sang to Me
Peter Gabriel - My Body is a Cage
King Charles - Mississippi Isabel
The Beatles - Yellow Submarine
The Coral - Dreaming of You 
Ylvis - The Fox (What Does the Fox Say?)
VAST - Pretty When You Cry
Gary Jules - Mad World
Passion Pit - Sleepyhead
Lenka - The Show
Placebo - Pure Morning
Katzenjammer - Tea With Cinnamon
Katzenjammer - Le Pop
Auburn - Perfect Two
Juanes - La Camisa Negra
Cyndi Lauper - Fearless 
3 Doors Down - Kryptonite
Eagle Eye Cherry - Save Tonight
Ricky Marin - Livin' la Vida Loca 
Rihanna - Unfaithful
Rihanna - Man Down 
Eminem feat Nate Dogg - Till I Collapse
Eminem - Lose Yourself
Kanye West - Homecoming
Kanye West - Heartless 
Nine Horses - Wonderful World
Nine Horses - The Banality of Evil
Billy Joel - Piano Man  
Sting - Shape of my Heart
Stevie Wonder & Paul McCartney - Ebony and Ivory
Jona Lewie - You'll Aways Find Me in The Kitchen at Parties
Gregory and Hawk - Oats We Sow
Yolanda Be Cool - We no Speak Americano
Men at Work - Down Under
The xx - Friction
The xx - Crystalized
Bob Marley - Buffalo Soldier
FUN - We Are Young
P!nk feat. Nate Ruess - Just Give Me a Reason
P!nk - Try
The Kelly Family - Flip a Coin
Tiziano Ferro - Rosso Relativo
Michel Teló - Ai Se Eu Te Pego
Swedish House Mafia - Don't You Worry Child 
Zucchero feat. Ronan Keating - Il Volo (The Flight)
The White Stripes - Seven Nation Army
Lighthouse Family - High
Soul Asylum - Runaway Train
Coldplay - Fix You
Gotye feat. Kimbra - Somebody That I Used To Know





Le LIST goes on and on, but now I really have to get going.

There is no Right Answer to All the Questions

Rīga 2013

 

"Nepūt pīlītes"

My new header picture on Twitter

 Cēsis, Nov 2013

 Tērbatas, Rīga, 2013 Autumn

Lisbon, Feb 2014

How?

Why bother with love
when there are so many broken hearts?
It makes no sense,
and it makes me question life.

It makes me wonder why humans are so weak,
why are we mortals so fragile?
We melt like sugar,
and we break like a thin pieces of glass.

We are so full and empty all at the same time.
We have a gift - life, and then we ride through it.
We break at the moments when we have to stay strong.
We give up and forget.

Us, humans, we forget the important thing.
At times we hide away from the truth,
we cry and we let it all out.
Or we trap it all inside of us.

When there is no certainty on our planet,
how can we know;
how can we know
that it's right to go on?

It's March!

Well, well, well.

Time sure flies. So many things have been going on, I don't even know where to start.
First, last month my first niece was born (after four nephews you'd think it's about time!), and that has been on top of my happy list lately.
I also begun my driving theory classes, so far they've not been awesome. I am learning things, but the dude teaching me and le group is some old fart who has zero faith in young people and he thinks that Latvia's current president is the only decent president he's seen in office ever. (To put in in a perspective, the current president has the worst rating off all the presidents we have had.)
But lucky for me that I study from books, and it's basically just memorizing so I don't really have to give a damn about what he says or doesn't say. Just have to be at the class twice a week.
Later this month I'll be going to Portugal again! I can't wait. I am so excited, I just want to make flips like a small puppy, but then I realize that I can't do that.
My friend has moved into a flat, and her boyfriend has arrived, and to be honest I am jealous of her. But she knows it. :D
And I have a job interview next week, and I am so worried, but it's good that I've not quit my current job, so I don't have to panic too much.
Life is moving forward at a speed that I can't really follow along to, just keep playing catch-up with it. I've also been sick for two weeks or so. Bad cough, had high temperature and the past two days my head just keeps aching. Oh well.

Work has become really dull. I'm at work now and I seriously can't be bothered to do much. Blah! Have to reply to yet another complaint, people are just ridiculous!


Also winter was gone all February, ha, I've even forgotten what snow feels like. Winter was gone before it actually got here. The migratory birds have started to come back. The pussy willow has begun to bloom. The sun leaves later and comes right back up around the time I get up from my sleep. The lights in the city dim off soon in the morning. People seem to ditch their warm coats, hats and mittens. I guess spring is here.

Lost!

I feel very, very lost right now. More than ever I feel like I have no home, like there is no place where I belong. There is nothing holding me to one place, and I want to be gone again. It's a daunting feeling of empty. It is eating at me, inside and out. I feel like a broken piece of nothing. There is nothing that makes me feel fulfilled.

Last weekend I had the best time of my life! It was so pure and beautiful. Imagine if I had to live only three days in my life, I would live those three days. I would want to go back and relive those days over and over again.

Good morning!

Dear _________,

Thank you for choosing __________ Hotel.
I have booked a room for your guest __________.
Please see reservation confirmation letter in the attachment.
Does your guest require pick up at the airport, if so, could you please provide flight details?

If you have any further questions, do not hesitate to ask.

Best regards,
_________ Hotel
Receptionist ________
Tel ______________
Skype ___________
Other blah, blah, blah stuff

Don't Date a Girl Who Travels

A friend of mine posted a link on Facebook.com to this lovely post: Don't Date a Girl Who Travels. It says that the text has been translated into several other languages, and Latvian was not listed, so I decided to translate it.

Nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo.

Viņa ir tā, kurai ir izpūruši, saule izbalējuši mati. Viņas āda vairs nav tik gaiša kā kādreiz. Tā pat nav saules skūpstīta. Tā ir sadegusi. Tai ir vairākas iedeguma līnijas, šur un tur rētas un kodieni. Bet par katru ādas  nobrāzumu viņai ir kāds interesants stāsts stāstāms.

Nesatiecies ar meitenei, kas ceļo. Viņu ir grūti apmierināt. Parastais vakariņu randiņš, filma un lielveikals viņai liksies galīgi garām, tas izsūks no viņas dzīvību. Viņas dvēsele alkst pēc jauniem piedzīvojumiem un  pārdzīvojumiem. Viņu nespēsi iespaidot ar savu jauno auto un dārgo pulksteni. Viņa daudz labprātāk kāptu kādā kalnā vai lēktu ārā no lidmašīnas nekā klausītos tavās lielībās.

Nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo, jo viņa tev uzkratīsies ar lūgumu, lai nopērc aviobiļetes ikreiz, kad kāda aviokompānija piedāvā atlaides. Viņa neballēsies Republiq clubā. Viņa nemūžam nemaksās simt dollārus par Avicii koncertu, jo zin, ka viena nedēļas nogale klubos ir apmēram tas pats, kas nedēļa pavadīta kaut, kur kur ir daudz interesantāk.

Viņai, viticamāk, nav patstāvīga darba. Vai viņa daudz domā par aiziešanu no darba. Viņa nevēlās strādāt vaiga sviedros, lai sasniegtu kāda cita cilvēka sapņus. Viņai ir savi mērķi un viņa pēc tiem tiecās. Viņa ir brīvmāksliniece. Viņa pelna dizainējot, rakstot, fotogrāfējot, vai darot ko citu, kur vajadzīga radoša izpausme un bagāta iztēle. Pat nemēģini izniekot viņas laiku sūdzoties par savu garlaicīgo darbu.

Nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo. Viņa, iespējams, ir izniekojusi savu augstskolas diplomu un krasi nomainījusi savu karjeru. Viņa tagad varbūt ir niršanas instruktore vai vada jogas nodarbības. Viņa nav īsti pārliecināta, kad kontā parādīsies alga. Bet viņa nestrādās kā robots visas dienas garumā. Viņa iet ielās un izbauda to, ko dzīve piespēlē, un izaicinās tev darīt tā pat. 

Nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo, jo viņa ir izvēlējusies dzīvē nedrošāko ceļu. Viņai nav plāna, nav vienas adreses. Viņa seko ritmam, un dodas tur, kur sirds vada. Viņa dejo pie savu bungu ritmiem. Viņai nav ap roku apsiets pulkstenis. Viņas dienas vada saule un mēness. Kad viļņi sauc, dzīve stājas un viss pārējais ir bijis nebijis. Bet viņa ir iemācījusies, ka svarīgākais dzīvē nav sērfot.

Nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo, jo viņa saka, ko domā. Viņa nemēģinās atstāt labu iespaidu uz tevi vai draugiem. Viņa zin, kas ir cieņa, bet nebaidās iesaistīties debatēs par globālām un sociālām problēmām.

Viņai tevi nekad nevajadzēs. Viņa pati zin kā uzbliezt telti, kā saskrūvēt dēļus, visu bez tavas palīdzības. Viņa labi gatavo ēst un viņai nevajag, lai maksā par viņas maltītēm. Viņa ir satriecoši neatkarīga, un viņai nerūpēs vai ceļo ar viņu vai nē. Viņa aizmirsīs tev nodod ziņu, kad sasniegusi galamērķi.Viņa ir aizņemta dzīvojot tagadnē. Viņa sarunājas ar svešiniekiem. Viņa satiks daudz interesantu, līdzīgi domājošu pērsonību no visām pasaules malām. Tiem būs līdzīgas aizraušanās un līdzīgi sapņi. Viņai ar tevi būs garlaicīgi.

Tad nu nesatiecies ar meiteni, kas ceļo. Un, ja nu tu nevilšus iemīlies kādā, tad pat neiedomājies viņu paturēt. Laid viņu valā.

And here is the actual BLOG where the post comes from: 
http://www.lovethesearch.com/

Till I Collapse

I'm short of breath. Something terrible has happened and I don't know how to deal with this. I am 100% to be blamed. But I simply can't wrap my head around this. I do not know how to pass this forward. I don't know what comes now? What happens now?
Life seemed so great! Just .. most things were going well. But now .. now, there is no now.

Till I collapse. I've collapsed. I am so happy for my next weeks adventure. But I don't deserve it. I really don't. What now? I can't not take this trip, because that's not fair to others. But taking this trip is not fair to me, because I don't deserve this. I deserve nothing and I am a terrible person. I have no heart. I do, but I don't.

What now?
How do I tell the truth?
What happens now???

God damn, I feel dizzy, all the thoughts are overwhelming. My head is spinning!
What's the right thing to do?
There is no good way to do bad things.
And yet, they have to be done.

Please.
Stop.

Now Playing:  Eminem feat. Nate Dogg - Till I Collapse

Step One

News Flash: 2014 is going to be packed with change, because that is the only way I know how to live, how to survive. But with all that there come new challenges, different kind of challenges, some bigger, some smaller, some significant, some less important. Either way 2014. is going to be a new year and I want to make it a good one. Bite me. There will be hate, there will be tears, but I can handle it.

2014

It's here!
2014 has arrived. And change is about to happen. I would tell you what change, but I am pretty good at keeping secrets, so there is no way I'm telling you.

Either way kiddos, stay cool. :D